Changes
by kaitlin1227
Summary: Clarke knew she lived a privileged life but when her mom gets a new job that takes them to their vacation home in Arkadia she is ecstatic for the change. She never knew how much the move would really change her life but she will soon enough. Will be Clurphy but has a little Bellarke.
1. Prologue

_So I am working on yet another 100 ff... Had so many different things going through my head and have finally started to write them out..._

 _This will eventually be Clarke/Murphy (Clurphy?) but there will be some Bellarke, it actually starts out that way but that will not be endgame. I'm working toward Clarke/Murphy endgame. But its a slowburn..._

 _I figured there wasn't enough Clarke/Murphy so I want to change that!_

 _It's Modern AU and characters may seem kinda OOC._

 _Also will have some bad language.  
_

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Prologue

School had just let out for the summer and Clarke Griffin couldn't be more excited. In just a few hours they would be heading to their vacation house in Arkadia, it's what Clarke waited all year for. She was already packed and ready to go, in all reality she finished packing almost a week ago.

She pretended she was excited about the beach and just being away from everything but in all actuality it had nothing to do with that. It had to do with a certain neighbor that she couldn't get off her mind. The Griffins and Blake's have known each other for years and she couldn't help but develop a crush for the older sibling, even though she knew he was far too old for her. Her crush began when she was just a mere 13 years old and he was already 18. Of course she never acted on her feelings since he was already a legal adult.

Even though Clarke knew she would never act on her feelings toward Bellamy Blake she couldn't help but fantasize about him over the years. She knew that he could never feel the same about her, he only saw her as a child.

It had been 3 grueling years of going being around him and his family and keeping these feelings inside. She didn't know what it was but she thought this year would be different, she was now 16 and was fully developed and she couldn't help but smile when she thought about exactly how developed she was.

The drive seemed to take longer than usual but when they finally pulled up to the house she saw all the lights were already on. Which she figured meant that her parents had probably asked the neighbors to air out the place for them.

Once they were inside and had all their things unpacked there was a knock on the door.

"I got it." Clarke yelled as she ran toward the door.

As soon as she opened the door she was pulled into a hug by the Blake mother.

"I can't believe how much you've grown in this last year, you're really starting to look like a young lady." Aurora said looking her over.

Clarke was then greeted by the younger Blake sibling Octavia but no one else. She couldn't help but feel a little disappointed. The evening went well though, she just figured Bellamy was probably out, he was 21 now.

Clarke tossed and turned that night trying to sleep but since she slept most of the ride over she couldn't fall asleep so she decided to take a stroll by the beach. She quietly grabbed a tank top and pair of shorts, got dressed quickly then slipped out the door.

She had to admit that she really did miss the way the sand felt beneath her feet when she went home after her summers in Arkadia. Clarke couldn't help but notice there was a bonfire down the beach so without even thinking twice about it she slowly made her way toward it. Once she got close enough she noticed that most the people standing around the fire were all holding beer bottles. She hoped no one minded if she crashed.

Clarke strolled right up to the cooler and grabbed a beer out, noticing that no one even noticed she didn't belong.

"Clarke is that really you?" She heard a loud squeaky voice and when she turned around she saw Fox running toward her.

She smiled as the girl approached her "Hey Fox."

"You really are here aren't you?" She said overly happy.

Clarke couldn't help but just laugh, she and Fox were pretty good friends.

Clarke had lost track of time and how many beers she had consumed. She knew she shouldn't be drinking but it was something that she had started doing the last year even though she wasn't proud of it. Fox had wondered off somewhere which left Clarke to herself.

Clarke felt a tap on her shoulder and when she turned around she couldn't believe who stood there looking down at her, no one other than Bellamy Blake.

"Clarke Griffin it really is you, I thought I saw you earlier." He said trying not to look at her inappropriately but failed miserably.

"We just got in today, I was surprised I didn't see you at our welcome party." She said as she tried to stand, she was a little wobbly but she did finally successfully stand.

"I had stuff to do." He said indifferent.

"I get it Bellamy, you're a man and you have more important things to do than greet family friends that you haven't seen in almost a year." She tried to stay serious but failed she couldn't help but start laughing.

"How much have you had to drink?" He asked actually seeming a little concerned.

"Just enough." She giggled.

"I think it's time I get you home and in bed." He said all too seriously.

"Oh yea." She put her hands on his chest "And what are you going to do once you get me in bed?"

Bellamy just stared at her, he had never seen her like this before. This was all new territory for him.

"Loosen up." She said barley more than a whisper, pulling him toward her.

"Clarke." He said with a warning tone.

She shrugged her shoulders and then started walking back down the beach toward their houses. She could hear him following. She was about halfway down the beach when she felt his hands on her, he had grabbed ahold of her shoulder and slug her around. She stood there staring into his dark eyes and him into her deep blue ones.

For a moment, it almost seemed like he was going to kiss her but then out of nowhere he turned and continued walking toward their houses. Clarke stood there for a few more seconds before following behind him trying to figure out what had just happened, or almost happened.

She had expected him to walk past her house and go straight to his but was surprised when he stopped in front of hers and waited on her. She walked right past him not even making contact and quietly unlocked the door. It wasn't until she went to close the door that she realized Bellamy had followed her inside. She gave him a look trying to figure out what he was doing.

After realizing that she wasn't going to get any kind of response she walked up the steps toward her bedroom, walking inside and completely ignoring the fact that he was still following her. Once she heard the door close behind her she finally turned and around and make eye contact.

"What are you doing?" Clarke asked.

"I told you I was going to make sure you got to bed, I wasn't lying." Bellamy took a deep breath "What was you doing out there drinking anyway Clarke, your just a child."

She looked at him in disbelief "I am almost 17, I'm far from a child."

"You're sure acting like one right now." He stated.

Clarke shook my head "Look I know you don't know anything about me but this summer will be the last time I will be able to get a little wild, have some fun…"

"Why is that, this is your senior year after this your done with school." He said obviously not knowing what her mom had in store for her.

She gave a sarcastic laugh "I wish I would be done after this year but this will only be the beginning… I will be spending another 4 years as an undergrad then another 4 years of medical school then to top it all off I have another 3 to 8 years being an intern and a resident."

Bellamy just look at her like he didn't know what to say, finally he said "I'm taking it this isn't what you want?"

She shook her head "Not even close."

"Have you tried to talk to your parents?" He asked as he walked over to her bed and sat next to her.

"Until I was blue in the face." Clarke told him with a hint of sadness in her voice.

"They seriously want you to do something that you have no interest in?" He said in disbelief.

"Don't you know how it would make them look if their one and only child became an artist, not something that actually meant something?" Clarke repeated what her parents had told her on more than one occasion.

"You're an artist?" He asked interested.

She laughed lightly "I would like to be but without proper training you can't reach your full potential."

"One day you should show me what you can do." He patted her leg as he said that.

She smirked than said "Well you could always pose for me, it's the best way to experience art right, being a part of it?"

Bellamy looked at her speechless. "You want to draw me… What in the nude or something?"

Clarke couldn't help but laugh, this reaction from him was exactly what she was looking for. "Actually I was just trying to get you naked, I don't like to draw people."

Once again her words left him speechless.

"You really need to loosen up." She said before she was the one who was left speechless when he kissed her.

When he pulled away he just stared at her, he didn't know if kissing her was alright but when she kissed him a moment later he knew he read the situation right. What he hadn't expected was how quickly everything else would progress between them. Once minute they were just kissing and the next she was on top of him undressing herself.

Clarke was so in the moment she never second guessed that this was one of the worse possible things to do. Even though she had dreamed about Bellamy for as long as she could remember it didn't mean that he had ever thought of her this way. She knew that they had both been drinking and neither were thinking clearly.

The moment they actually connected came quicker than either expected. They didn't have time to think about what was right or wrong. Clarke had heard a lot about what sex felt like but it wasn't until this night, with the boy she had fantasized about far too many times that she finally knew for herself. She knew she shouldn't have lost her virginity like this but it happened and now it was too late, there was no going back.

Sometime in the middle of the night, she fell asleep and he slipped out of her bed and out of her house.

After that night Bellamy wouldn't talk to her and wouldn't even look at her. She had a feeling that he thought he took advantage of her but she knew it was completely mutual and if he would have allowed her to tell him that than she would have. Over the rest of the summer she attempted on multiple occasions to talk to him but had no luck.

Finally when August came Clarke and her family packed up their belongings and went back home. Leaving Arkadia for yet another year but all Clarke could think about was leaving Bellamy. She knew that what happened didn't mean that they were going to turn into girlfriend and boyfriend but she just assumed that it would have brought them closer but she was completely wrong. It had the opposite effect than she hoped.


	2. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

It had been months since summer had ended and Clarke and her family went back home. Everything was going exactly as they had in the previous years until her mom told her that her and her dad needed to have a talk with her. Clarke didn't know exactly what was going on but she knew it was something serious. She came straight home from school, her parents were already waiting on her.

"Sit Clarke." Her mother said as she walked through the door.

"What's going on?" She asked concerned "Are you getting a divorce?"

Her dad chuckled "No it's nothing like that."

She looked between her mom and dad "Then what is it?"

Abby cleared her throat "I've been offered the chief of surgery job."

Clarke looked at her mom "Well that's great, that's what you've been after for as long as I can remember."

"It is a great opportunity but Clarke it's not for here." Her mom said cautiously.

"What do you mean?" She asked confused.

"The job, it's for the hospital in Arkadia, not here." Abby gave a weak smile.

"Wait a minute, what? We're going to be moving?" Clarke was just starting to understand.

"This is a great opportunity for your mother Clarke, I know it's not idea to change schools your senior year but we can't pass this up." Jake came to Abby's defense.

Clarke thought for a second "I don't mind to move."

She knew her parents weren't expecting her response but school was never her thing, it was her parents. So if her parents want to move than it was fine with her.

Abby threw her arms around her daughter "thank you Clarke."

Clarke couldn't help but chuckle, "its fine mom."

XxXxXxXxXx

December came quicker than she had hoped and it was now time to move. Since Abby's job didn't officially start until the beginning of December they decided that she'd go by herself and then Clarke and her dad would wait until winter break started so she wouldn't miss any school. They had just finished packing the last bit of their belongings and were headed out the door, heading to their new life.

Clarke really didn't know what to expect, she had never been to a new school before. She was nervous that she wouldn't fit in but in all reality it really didn't bother her. She's lived her whole life not fitting in, she had two parents that were the best at what they did and were well known for it then there she was who absolutely hated the person her mom made her be. She knew her dad was more open about everything but even he believed she should follow in her mother's footsteps.

When they pulled up to the new house she would be spending the next 5 months at Clarke could only think about one thing and that was what happened the last time she was here. She looked over at the Blake house and saw Octavia's smiling face watching them pull up. As soon as they were parked she was out of her house and beside the car.

"I was so excited when Abby said you guys were going to be living here, I know it's only going to be a couple months for you but it'll be nice having someone my age around here." Octavia was full of energy she was only a year younger than her but she seemed a lot younger, maybe it was just because of the way Clarke was raised.

Clarke nodded "Yea I'll be here until graduation then off to med school."

"That's so cool, are you going to be a doctor like your mom?" She asked excitably.

"I'm not sure yet, I gotta make it past med school first." She told her, if she was to be honest though she would have told her that she might not make it through school because she didn't want to.

"Well I know you can do it, you're one of the smartest people I've ever met." She had the biggest smile on her face.

"We'll see." She gave her a genuine smile. "So how's your brother doing with his college experience?"

"Really good, you know he was accepted to better schools but decided to go to a local college just so he could stay closer to me." It was obvious that she idolized her brother.

"Oh really?" Clarke hadn't known that, in all reality she really didn't know much about him at all.

She just started thinking and she was really starting to regret the decision to sleep with Bellamy. She had given him her virginity because that's what she had always dreamed would happen, but now really thinking about it she didn't know him all at. Yea they grew up with each other over the summers but the last few years he really hadn't even been around. She didn't know what he liked and didn't like, hell she didn't even know what he was going to school for.

"Clarke, are you alright?" She finally heard Octavia ask.

"Yea sorry, was just thinking." She looked at Octavia guiltily because she had just completely tuned her out thinking about her brother. "But I do need to get inside, it's been a long trip."

Octavia looked sad for a moment then smiled and said "alright well maybe we could do something tomorrow."

"Maybe I'll get ahold you sometime tomorrow." Clarke told her as she turned around and walked into the house.

As soon as Clarke walked into the house she noticed her dad was on the phone yelling at someone. She couldn't make out what he was saying but it was obvious that he was pissed about something. As Clarke watched him, it became more and more clear who he was talking to. Her mom. With her being a surgeon she wasn't home much and Clarke could only imagine now with her being chief that they would never see her but it really didn't bother her that much. She liked it much better being just her and her dad.

She was staring at her dad when he threw his phone across the room. He stopped as soon as he noticed Clarke standing there. "I'm sorry, you shouldn't have saw that."

"It's alright dad, I'm guessing you guys are arguing about her job again?" Clarke asked him.

The look that he gave told her right away that it was something different but he didn't say so all he said was "you don't need to worry about our problems hun."

He kissed the top of her head then walked up the stairs. Clarke looked after him not knowing what to think. No more than 10 minutes later he was back down the stairs completely changed.

"Hey princess I'm going to go out for a bit, will you be ok by yourself?" He asked her like she had never been left alone before.

"Dad I'm 17 not a little kid anymore, so yea I'll be fine here, you sure you don't want me to come along with you though?" She hated him being alone when he seemed so down.

"I'm sure, I just need some time to myself." He gave her a small smile than walked out the door.

Clarke sat around the house for a little while longer and decided since her mom and dad didn't want to be home their first night there that she wasn't going to be either. She sighed then grabbed her car keys and walked out the door. She hadn't decided where she was headed until she had pulled up outside a little bar that she sometimes frequented when she was there during the summers.

She walked in and was surprised that it was actually pretty busy. She sat at the bar not needing a table. The bartender smiled at her and told her that she'd be there in a minute. Clarke was looking around the room trying to see if she recognized any of the people, there were a few that looked familiar but no one that she really knew.

"What can I get for you?" The brunette asked her.

"Can I get an ocean breeze?" Clarke said looking at the menu.

"Can I see some ID?" She asked and when Clarke looked up she was staring at her.

"Oh yea." Clarke laughed and got out her fake ID that said she was 21 and handed it to her.

The bartender looked at it and looked at it hard like she was trying to make sure it was real. Finally she handed it back to her then said "you look younger than 21."

"I actually hear that more often that I'd like to admit." Clarke chuckled "I guess when I'm older it won't be such a terrible thing that I look younger."

Clarke had only been at the bar/club for about an hour when she was approached by a couple guys who looked to be about her age. She thought they had looked familiar but couldn't put names with their faces. They both had longer brown hair, one went right past his ears and the other went about to his shoulders.

The one with the longer hair came and sat next to her while the other stood between them. Clarke looked from one to the other. "Do you need something?"

"Are you new around here?" He asked questionably.

"Yes and no." She answered.

The one standing chuckled "What does that mean exactly?"

"I'm usually only here during the summers but it was never permanent." Clarke really wasn't sure how to answer.

"I told you it was the Princess" the one standing said looking at his friend sitting.

It was obvious as soon as the other one put two and two together and realized who she was.

"Princess huh?" She asked looking between the two boys.

"You have that house next to the Blake's don't you?" The sitting boy asked.

She nodded. "And my names Clarke, I think it would be ok to just use that."

The standing boy smiled and when his blue eyes met hers she couldn't look away "I'm Murphy."

"I was wondering where you ran off to, Finn." A black haired girl walked up behind the boy sitting by her and wrapped her arms around his neck.

"We were just making friends." Finn said looking from Clarke to his girlfriend.

She smiled at the new addition and said "I'm Clarke."

"Raven." She returned the smile. "They weren't bothering you were they?"

She shook her head but couldn't help but notice that Finn kept stealing glances at her and she wasn't liking it much. Not when he was obviously in a relationship.

Even though initially she felt kind of off when she met Murphy, Finn and Raven she ended up having a great night with the three of them. Even though she still wasn't sure what she thought about Finn she really liked Raven so she would have to deal with him. Clarke knew it was starting to get late and she should be getting home but she never did, it wasn't until they started calling last call that she finally stopped drinking. By that point she was feeling pretty tipsy and she was glad she was because she didn't know how she'd deal with what happened next if she was sober.

"What the hell are you doing here Clarke?" She heard a familiar voice come from behind her that she hadn't heard in many months.

"Well hello to you to Bellamy." She didn't even turn around, she just looked across from her which just happened to be straight at Finn.


	3. Chapter 2

_Thank you Heidi for your review and because of that I figured I'd go ahead and update the next chapter today_

 _Also thank you to those who fav/followed as well_

 _Still a little Bellarke in this chapter but it will be changing slowly, I know I'm trying to make a Clurphy fic here and still tend to go to Bellarke as well haha. Guess thats what happens when you have a Bellarke shipper, writing Clurphy!  
_

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Chapter 2

Bellamy was obviously pissed off that Clarke was there and she wasn't sure why. She knew that something had happened between the two of them but that had been over 6 months ago now. There was no reason for him to be acting like that.

She took a deep breath than stood up and turned around to face Bellamy. "Can I help you with something?"

He seemed like he was pretty pissed off especially when she turned around "are you drunk?"

"Why does it matter Bellamy?" She said trying to hide how much she had actually drunk.

He turned back to the brunette bartender that had served her and said accusingly. "You served a 17 year old, you could be fired."

Her eyes grew huge "I didn't know, her ID said she was 21."

He turned back around to face Clarke "It doesn't matter who you hurt does it? As long as you get what you want."

Clarke was speechless Bellamy had never spoken to her that way before.

"Why do I feel like I'm watching a lovers quarrel." Clarke heard from behind her, she was guessing it came from Raven since it was a female's voice.

"Not even close, I thought we were friends since our families have known each other for years but I guess I was wrong, a friend wouldn't talk about someone like that if they considered them a friend." Clarke's feelings were hurt, she had never been nothing but nice to Bellamy. She knew what happened between them shouldn't have and she knew that now, it was a mistake that they had both made.

Bellamy attempted to say something else but Clarke wasn't listening. She was so mad that it didn't matter what he had to say, she just walked out the door not looking back as she left. When she reached her car she realized that she was too drunk to drive, she hadn't thought about that before she started drinking. She unlocked her doors but just stood outside her car trying to think about what she was going to do.

She saw Bellamy walking toward her from the corner of her eye but she didn't face him.

"I'm sorry I was out of line, I shouldn't have said that." He said as he approached her.

Clarke finally looked at him "I don't get it, you completely ignore me all summer and now you act like this."

He sighed "I don't know why I acted like that, I guess I was just shocked, I didn't think I would ever see you again."

The way he said that made Clarke look at him again and the moment she did she wished she wouldn't have. The way he was looking at her was the same way he had the night they were together. She didn't know what she was thinking but she closed the space between them and kissed him, it wasn't some gentle kiss it was hard and rough. She hadn't expected him to respond to her kiss the way he did, he had her up against her car in just a matter of seconds. He pulled her up and she wrapped her legs around his waist.

She had no idea how long they continued but she never wanted it to stop. But it did and abruptly far sooner than Clarke had anticipated.

"What the hell?" She heard a very angry voice coming from behind Bellamy, she couldn't see the face but she could hear the anger very clearly.

Bellamy stopped automatically, almost dropping Clarke in the process. "Gina."

He turned around just in time to get an angry hand across his face. Clarke now knew who the voice belonged to, the bartender. By looking at the two of them, there was something going on there.

"Two years Bellamy, two fucking years and you waste that on some child." Gina was shouting and Clarke realized she was the other girl. No wonder Bellamy pulled away after they had sex, he had a girlfriend.

"I'm sorry Gina." He said and honestly he really did look sorry "I didn't mean for it to happen."

Gina looked from Bellamy to Clarke "and I'm taking it this isn't the first time this has happened? After what happened in there I knew there was something between you two."

Bellamy looked guilty "one other time, over the summer."

"My god Bellamy she's just a child, what are you thinking?" Gina had finally calmed down, she wasn't yelling anymore but her emotions were all over the place.

"I wasn't…" He put his head in his hands.

Clarke looked at Gina "I didn't know, if I would have I would have never put him in this kind of situation."

"This isn't your fault, he's the adult he should have known better." Gina actually seemed sweet and Clarke hated that she did this to her.

"I know it's not completely my fault but I am the one who initiated it both times, I've grown up having the biggest crush on him and I finally decided to do something about it. I know he could have turned me away and now I know that he should have but it wasn't just his fault and I want you to know I'm sorry about my part in it." Clarke knew she shouldn't lie to Gina since it was Bellamy who actually initiated it last time but she couldn't help it, she wanted to protect him.

Bellamy turned and looked at Clarke but she wouldn't look at him not after he made her the other girl. She lost her virginity to someone who was in a committed relationship with someone else. This wasn't sitting well with her, she was getting more and more pissed the longer she thought about it. Finally she said "I gotta go."

She turned and got in her car, drove home without looking back. The whole experience sobered her up. When she got home her dad still wasn't there, which she preferred so he wouldn't see her this way. She was so upset with herself that she was in tears by the time she made it home.

XxXxXxXxXx

Over the next two weeks it was Clarke's turn to ignore Bellamy, he had tried on multiple occasions to talk to her but she wasn't going to give him the satisfaction. She needed him to feel awful about what he did because she felt awful about it. It made her feel dirty and she wasn't liking it very much.

She had been hanging around with Raven, Finn and Murphy a lot. They couldn't go back to the bar anymore since Gina obviously knew they were underage now so they had been between Raven's and Clarke's when no one was home.

It was the last weekend before school was going to start back up. Abby was at the hospital and Jake was out somewhere, which he had been a lot lately. Clarke had a feeling that they were in the works of a divorce but were just waiting until Clarke graduated. Clarke had decided to have her friends come over that weekend.

Raven was running late but Finn and Murphy had decided to come on over and they'd just wait on Raven. When the doorbell rang Clarke was in the kitchen so she just said "come on in" and went back to doing what she was doing.

She turned around from the fridge and saw Bellamy standing there.

"What do you want?" She asked instantly getting pissed.

"You've been avoiding me." He said like he didn't understand why.

"Seriously? Why wouldn't I be? Why the hell would I want to talk to you?" Clarke didn't want to show him how much he affected her but she couldn't help it.

"Just let me apologize to you." He said softly.

"I don't want to hear an apology from you, I just want you to leave." Clarke said harshly.

"Why are you acting this way? It's not like we were a couple or anything, I never promised you anything, we just had sex that's it." It was obvious that Bellamy didn't understand and she was planning on leaving it at that until he said that, she didn't know what it was about what he said but it pissed her off.

"You want to know why I'm acting this way." Clarke was shouting by this point "It's because I was a virgin and to think that I gave my virginity to some egotistical cheating asshole don't sit very well with me."

Just as she was finished speaking she heard the door shut and looked behind Bellamy to see Finn and Murphy walk into the kitchen.

Clarke sighed "Great. You can go now Bellamy."

Bellamy looked like he was about to say something else but decided against it and turned and left. Clarke looked at her two new guy friends and felt embarrassed.

"Sorry you had to hear that." She told them.

"Don't be, we all have baggage." Finn said as he walked toward her and put his arm around her shoulders.

Murphy just smiled at her.

After a few minutes Clarke grabbed them all a drink and they went and sat in the living room. Clarke sat first and Finn sat right next to her then Murphy sat in the chair next to the couch. On a few different occasions Clarke attempted to move a little so Finn wouldn't be so close but somehow he would end up just as close as he had been before. After a few attempts Clarke just went with it and was thinking it was all in her mind.

Clarke put on a movie, she really didn't know what to do without Raven there. She hated to admit it but Raven was the one who was always the life of the party, Clarke had never really had any friends to know what others thought of fun. She chose a scary movie thinking since she was with a couple guys that they would prefer something like that over some chick flick.

The first half hour of the movie things were going good, they were sitting there drinking their beers watching the movie. Then are one of the jumpy parts Finn decided to put his arm around her. She still hadn't thought much about it, thinking it was just because she had been scared. But then when he put his other hand on her thigh, she started feeling that the whole situation was off.

She took his hand and went to remove it and he must have took it for she was trying to hold his hand because he tried to kiss her. She pushed him back automatically. "What the hell are you doing?"

"You know you want to Clarke, just go with it." He tried to push her back on the couch.

"The hell I do." She pushed him back but since he was obviously stronger than her he was able to get her pushed back onto the couch.

Finn tried to kiss her again but she was able to turn her head. She didn't know how she got in this situation she truly thought these two were her friends. How could she have been so stupid?

"Come on Princess." He was rubbing his hand down her side.

"Stop Finn." She cried out.

"Finn come on man, she said stop." Murphy finally stood up for her.

"Keep out of it Murphy, you can have her next." He said with a sick smile.

Clarke tried her hardest to get free, she attempted to kick him, she attempted to hit him. But in every way possible he out powered her. She had started to cry at this point.

"Please Finn, don't do this." She tried to get him to listen but he wasn't even paying attention to her.

"Get off her." Murphy had finally stood up and was standing next to them.

"Mind your own business." Finn still wasn't taking him serious but that changed a minute later when Murphy grabbed ahold of his shirt and threw him onto the ground.

When Finn stood up he went for Murphy but Murphy was quicker and he punched him in the face. Finn was back on the ground with just the one punch. Blood was seeping from his hand and starting to cover the floor.

"What happened?" Raven had finally made her way there. Clarke wasn't sure if she was happy to see her or not.


	4. Chapter 3

_Well Heidi I hope I can keep you interested. This chapter has a little Clurphy but just some feels lol._

 _If anyone else is following thank you :)_

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Chapter 3

It had almost been a month since the incident happened between Clarke and Finn. It took almost a full day but Raven had finally came around and apologized for Finn's behavior. Clarke apologized to Raven as well, she didn't know if she had led him on in some way. She hadn't meant to if she had. Raven told her she was ridiculous that even if she had unintentionally flirted with him or something it still gave him no right to do what he did.

Raven had broken up with Finn which in turn, turned him against Clarke. Her first few weeks at the new school was awful, he spread rumors about her. He also told the whole school about her and Bellamy which was horrible because Octavia also went to that school. She was surprised that Murphy had stuck with her and Raven and not with Finn. But between the both of them they really helped make school not so bad.

Since she was in all advanced classes she didn't have anyone she knew in any of her classes. Clarke found out that there was an art class and she was able to switch out one of the classes she didn't need for it. She didn't think she had ever been happier than she was the day she attended her first class. She became a teachers pet right away because she was so good, it didn't seem to bother any of the other students though which she was grateful for, she didn't need to give them another reason to not like her.

Since Clarke had started taking the art class she realized she didn't hate drawing people as much as she previously thought she had. She also realized that she was really good at it, so she started sketching all the time. Trying to capture all the moments she was living.

Clarke was sitting at lunch with Murphy and Raven, she had her sketchbook on the table closed. Her and Raven were talking and she hadn't realized Murphy had picked up her book and started looking through her sketches.

"You really are good." Murphy's voice took her from Raven.

When she looked at Murphy her eyes widen "you're not supposed to see those."

Murphy chuckled "why you don't want me to see this?" he held up a sketch that she had drawn of him.

Clarke was embarrassed "it's awful I know."

"No it's not." Raven agreed with Murphy's earlier statement "it's really good."

Clarke could feel her cheeks redden. "You really think so?"

Murphy handed the book to Raven and as she skimmed through the pages Clarke could tell by the expression on her face that she really did like her sketches. As Raven got to the end of the sketches she got a huge smile on her face.

"What?" Clarke asked her confused by her smile.

"You sure like to draw a certain someone." Raven said looking at Murphy.

She felt her cheeks getting hot "I like his features, its makes him fun to draw."

Murphy looked up then from Clarke to Raven, looking confused. "Did I miss something?"

"Nope." Clarke said quickly, he must have stopped before he got to the rest of the drawings of him.

Raven laughed a big hearty laugh. Clarke thought for a second that she was going to sell her out since in all reality Raven and Murphy were friend's way before Clarke came around, but she was happy when she didn't.

XxXxXxXxXx

Raven went to Clarke's after school. The moment they walked in the door Raven was grilling her for information. "So how long you had a crush of Murphy?"

"I don't know what you're talking about." Clarke said innocently.

"Oh really, I think your fascinated with him." Raven said as she grabbed Clarke's book bag, grabbing her sketchbook out all in one swift shot.

Clarke's tried to grab the book back from her but Raven was going through page by page counting. "You drew Murphy 8 times, 8 times Clarke, I think you might like him a little… Hell you only drew Bellamy twice."

"But I see Murphy more often." Clarke tried to make excuses.

"He's a good guy Clarke, he'd be good for you, I mean yea he's a little rough around the edges but who isn't nowadays." Raven obviously thought a lot about Murphy.

"Let's say I did have a little crush, it wouldn't matter anyway." Clarke sighed "As soon as I graduate I'm off to college and more than likely that'll be in Massachusetts."

"What's in Massachusetts?" Raven asked curiously.

"Harvard." Clarke said not too happily.

Raven's expression changed dramatically "Harvard really, you might be going to Harvard? You must really be smart."

Clarke couldn't help but laugh, "I already got early admission into Harvard but to tell you the truth I'd rather not go there, I'm hoping to get accepted somewhere that has an awesome art program as well."

"I can't believe your parents would make you go somewhere that you don't want to go." Raven rubbed her temple.

"All that really matters is that she's paying for my college so she thinks it should be her choice what I go for, my dad isn't that bad but as you can tell he's not around much anymore." Clarke was sad about her dad's absence in her life, they had always been so close but it seemed like ever since they moved to Arkadia that he was never around anymore.

"Well back to what we were originally talking about, we still have a few months until graduation and if you like him maybe you should get together and decide if it's something that you should pursue even if you are leaving in a couple months." Raven made a good point but Clarke still wasn't sold on the idea.

"I just don't think it would be fair to either of us." She shrugged her shoulders "What if we get to attached, what happens then? I get my heart broken because I have to leave him."

"You really do like him don't you?" Raven caught on to the way she spoke about Murphy,

Clarke honestly hadn't realized until that moment just how she felt about Murphy. She knew she was attracted to him, but she knew that from the moment they met. "We can't be anything more than friends, it doesn't matter how I feel."

Clarke and Raven spent a few more hours there talking about boys and school. Clarke had never had a real friend before moving, she knew originally the only reason she was alright with moving was because she wanted to be closer to Bellamy but now things were so different. She hadn't even spoken to Bellamy since the day he came over and apologized, she guessed he finally just gave up on trying to get her to forgive him.

XxXxXxXxXx

Over the next few weeks Raven never let up about Clarke and Murphy even though Clarke was serious when she said she didn't want to get involved. Clarke and Murphy were already sitting at the lunch table waiting on Raven, which was different because Raven was usually always the first one there. Clarke just figured this was another one of Raven's tricks to try and get them together.

When Raven finally entered the lunch room she had the biggest grin on her face. As soon as she got to the table she practically yelled "I got into NYU."

"Are you serious?" Clarke was beyond excited "That means that we'll be less than 4 hours apart if I end up in Boston."

Raven threw her arms around Clarke's neck.

"You're planning to go to Boston after graduation?" Murphy's question brought the girls out of their very girly moment.

"Not sure yet but yea probably." Clarke answered.

"And you didn't think you should have told me." Murphy seemed upset.

His attitude completely threw Clarke, she didn't know how to respond.

"I am your friend to right? Not just Raven." Murphy said after he realized that Clarke wasn't going to respond.

"Of course you're my friend to. I'm sorry I thought you knew." She knew in that moment that she really did feel something for Murphy and having him upset with her did something that she didn't like one bit.

"In order for me to know, you would have had to of told me and since you didn't, no I didn't know." Murphy stood up "I thought I meant more to you than that."

"You do." Clarke tried to say but Murphy was already gone.

Clarke looked at Raven who was just as surprised as she was about his outburst.

"What do I do?" Clarke asked Raven.

"Go after him." Raven said and before Clarke could really think she was out of her seat and running to the door that he went out.

She opened the door and looked around but didn't see him at first. She had almost given up before she saw him leaning up against some lockers. She walked, but a little faster than normal, hoping that he wouldn't take off again.

"Murphy." She said softly as she approached him.

He took a deep breath then looked up at her, the moment their blue eyes met she felt it, she felt the connection between them. "I'm sorry Clarke, I shouldn't have said those things."

Clarke cautiously took his hand in hers. "You had every right to be upset with me, I purposely hadn't told you about my move, I didn't want you to know."

"I don't understand." Murphy looked confused.

"I think in my mind if you didn't know then it wasn't real, but the moment I told you then reality would set in and I would have to leave you." Clarke let out a breath that she hadn't realized she was holding.

Murphy looked like he wasn't sure how to respond. Finally after far too long he said "Uh I don't know if somehow I've given you the wrong impression here but I only care about you as a friend."

Clarke was completely speechless, she had really just made a fool out of herself. She slowly slipped her hand from his, then without another word she turned around and walked away from him. She had read the situation completely wrong, now she felt like a complete idiot.

She went and found Raven and headed straight to the girls bathroom. The moment they were alone she started crying, she really wasn't sure why she was crying. It's not like her and Murphy were an item and he had just broken up with her or anything. In her mind she was pretty sure that she had just ruined her friendship with him and that hurt because in her 17 years she had only had two people that she could call a friend and she really hoped she hadn't just lost one of them.

Once Clarke was finally able to tell Raven what was wrong, it pissed her off instantly. "He's lying."

Clarke looked at her confused, "why would he lie?"

"Cause he's scared just like you. Damn him. You finally opened up to him and he screwed it all up." Raven shook her head. "I'm sorry I talked you into going after him even though you didn't want to."

"Funny thing is I didn't mean to tell him… Well actually I didn't tell him, exactly." Clarke said a little cryptic.

"What do you mean?" Raven was curious now.

Clarke told her about the conversation, she tried to replay the conversation exactly like it happened.

Once she was finished Raven asked "Is it true? You really meant to keep it from him?"

"I don't know, yes and no, I knew I should have told him but I was waiting until I knew for sure where I was going." Clarke sighed.

"You might not be going to Boston?" Raven asked confused because this was something she hadn't shared with her.

"I'm waiting on a response from Columbia, if I'm accepted there I think I will turn Harvard down." Clarke said surprising not only Raven but herself. She hadn't realized that she was seriously considering not going to Harvard.

"Columbia… Like New York Columbia?" Raven said overly excited.

"The one and only." Clarke laughed at her friend's excitement.


	5. Chapter 4

_Exactly, what the hell Murphy! lol! That seems like something that was said a lot actually watching the 100 to... I've been rewatching from the beginning for my other story and watching Murphy's actions really shows how much of an ass he was lol. Its crazy to see how much he's actually grown in the show._

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Chapter 4

It had been a couple days since Clarke and Murphy got into their argument and still they hadn't talked about what happened. They still hung out at school when Raven was around but the moment Raven was gone Murphy followed close behind. Clarke hated the situation that she caused, she should have known better than to mess with something that was going good.

The end of the week was almost there and Clarke knew if she was going to talk to Murphy that she had to do it now because once the school let out she wouldn't be able to. She didn't want to go the whole weekend without seeing him. She looked around the hallway before her last class, she knew his class was only a couple doors down from hers so he had to be around there somewhere.

When she finally saw him, it made her heart hurt. He was kissing some girl, she wasn't sure what her name was but she had seen her around before. Clarke was so distracted that she didn't realize they had split apart or that they had started walking toward her. For a split second Clarke saw guilt flash across Murphy's face but it was gone as quickly as it appeared. Clarke smiled at them trying to pretend that the site hadn't affected her.

When they reached Clarke, Murphy introduced them "Clarke this is Emori, Emori Clarke."

Clarke smiled at her again "it's nice to meet you."

"You to." She was completely oblivious to the fact that Clarke already hated her even though she had no reason to.

Emori walked away and it just left Clarke and Murphy. She took a deep breath than finally said. "Do you think we could talk after school?"

Murphy shrugged nonchalantly, "sure."

"Would you mind coming by the house? Or would you rather just do it here?" She asked hating how nervous she felt.

"I can come over but it can't be for long, I promised Emori I'd take her out later." Clarke knew she should be happy that he was sharing this kind of information with her but she couldn't help but feel like he was just doing it to hurt her.

"She seems nice." Clarke wasn't sure why she said that.

"Yea I guess." He said as he walked away and into his classroom.

Clarke was now pretty sure that their friendship was done. She hoped she would be able to save it but since he was trying to intentionally hurt her she wasn't sure if she even wanted to anymore. Her last class went by quickly, she didn't wait around after class she just went straight home.

She checked the mail as she was unlocking the door. She tossed the mail on the table and grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge. She felt like she needed something stronger than water before she had this conversation with Murphy but it would have to do. She heard a knock on the door, she hadn't expected him to come straight over. She took a deep breath before opening the door, he didn't wait on an invitation he just walked past her.

"So what's up?" He asked as he began rummaging through her fridge.

She chuckled "make yourself at home why don't ya."

He turned around with a beer in hand, "want one?"

Clarke shook her head then held up her water.

"It's Friday, time to party." He popped the top off and took a drink.

"Yea but it's not even 3 yet." She replied.

"What's that?" He asked pointing to the mail that had been discarded on the table.

"It don't matter, junk I presume." She watched Murphy as he made his way to the table. "I didn't ask you here to talk about my mail."

He picked up an envelope "Columbia huh?"

That got Clarke's attention she hadn't figured to hear back from them so soon. She made her way to Murphy and grabbed the envelope from his hand and tore it open. As she started reading she felt the smile forming at her lips. She had been accepted. She wasn't sure why she thought for even a second that she wouldn't be but just reading the words made this the happiest day in her life.

Without thinking she grabbed ahold of Murphy and pulled him into a hug. "I got in."

When she felt him tense beneath her arms she realized what she did so she backed up. "Sorry. But it looks like I might not be going to Boston after all."

"I thought you wanted to go there?" Murphy asked obviously confused about her happiness of being accepted to Columbia.

"Hell no, that's all on my mom, if I wasn't too worried about disappointing them I wouldn't even go through medical school." Clarke finally shared this information with Murphy, she wasn't sure why she never told him. He knew she had a passion for art but that was it.

"I don't get it, you say were friends but then I learn that there is so much stuff you've kept from me." Murphy was obviously pissed that once again she had kept something from her.

"You want to know the truth Murphy, I didn't want you to know how pathetic my life was, before coming here I didn't have many friends so when I finally made some I didn't want them to know about my past." Clarke said softly "And if I'm being honest it didn't help that I started to like you, it just made me want to hide that much more."

"You don't hide things from your friends Clarke and I have a feeling Raven knows about everything but here I am left out." Murphy made a good point.

"She knows about most of it." She told him honestly "But I wasn't afraid to scare her away."

"Why are you just telling me all this now?" He asked her.

"I never wanted you to know how I felt." She paused "I've never done this before and honestly with graduation so close I didn't think it was a good idea to try anything because I knew I was leaving soon, whether it was Boston or New York, I was leaving… I've only had feelings for one person and that didn't go very well so I had every right to be scared."

Murphy moved closer to her. "But you did decide to tell me, why?"

"Raven kept telling me I should go for it but even with her pushing me I knew it was a bad idea, but when you got upset with me it just kind of came out, I didn't mean for it to but it did and now I can't take it back." Clarke wasn't sure what answer he expected to hear but she needed him to know the truth.

"Do you regret it?" She hadn't expected his question.

She looked up from her hands and met his eyes. "Yes. I feel like I messed up our friendship."

Murphy was quiet for a minute than said "you didn't mess anything up, I couldn't imagine not being friends with you even if it is only for a few more months."

Clarke couldn't help but smile "Well if I end up in New York I'll be less than a 4 hour drive away."

"Actually… You'll probably only be minutes from me." Murphy said with a slight smile.

"Huh?" Clarke was confused.

"Well Raven isn't the only one to get into NYU." He said with a huge smile on his face.

Clarke didn't know what to say, she hadn't even known that he wanted to go to NYU and now knowing that if she decided to go to Columbia that they would be close, really close. She took a deep breath than took a step back, knowing that she might do something that could make it impossible to repair their friendship.

"Well congratulations Murphy." Clarke said really happy for him. "It looks like I may not lose my best friends after all."

"You wouldn't lose me even if you decided to go to Harvard." Murphy said softly.

"I appreciate you saying that, I don't know what I'd do without you and Raven." Clarke may have wanted something more with him but it was obvious to her now that it was all one-sided.

"Just do me a favor and don't keep things from me, if you can talk to Raven about it then you can talk to me about it to." Murphy said as he walked back toward me.

"Hmm…" Clarke didn't know if this was the right time to share what she was about to but he wanted her to talk to her just like she would Raven. "There are some things that may be better left between a couple girls, especially when the one being discussed is you."

"If you need to talk to Raven about me, I expect you to talk to me first." He put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her a little closer.

She closed her eyes, not believing that she was actually about to open up to him. "Well first off Murphy when you do stuff like this it drives me absolutely crazy, you have no idea how it feels to be this close to someone and all you can think about is doing things that you don't do with a friend."

"Oh yea." He sounded surprised by her admission. She still hadn't opened her eyes, she didn't want to see his reaction.

"Shut up." She attempted to smack him but since her eyes were still closed she completely missed and ended up hitting the back of the couch which made her open her eyes. She noticed that he was staring at her. "Don't do that." She barely got out.

He slowly licked his lips and she couldn't help but move her eyes to his mouth. She wanted to kiss that mouth but she knew she shouldn't, she knew the consequences if she did. Finally she got the strength to look away from his lips, away from his eyes, away from him.

"I think it would be a good idea for you to go." Clarke said barley more than a whisper.

"I think that might be a good idea." It almost looked like he was struggling with the closeness just as much as she had been.

Once Murphy was out of the house Clarke laid down on the couch. She was so confused about Murphy, she had never met someone so frustrating. There were days like today that she could swear he felt something to but then other days when it was the complete opposite. She had a feeling that he was just as confused as she is.


	6. Chapter 5

_Thank you Heidi & Acharn for your reviews.._

 _Also thank all of the new favs/follows.._

 _I love you all :)_

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Chapter 5

It took Clarke a lot of debating to finally decide that she didn't want to go to Harvard. She knew medical wise it was the better option but she didn't want her life revolving only around medicine. She wanted the option to do her art as well and since Columbia had a good program for both she made up her mind. She knew the hard part was to come when she had to tell her decision to her parents but she knew how she would do that as well. She would get her dad on her side first then they would tackle her mom together.

Clarke got home from school just in time one day to catch her dad before he took off to wherever it was that he always went. "Hey can we talk for a minute?"

"Of course." Jake said with a smile.

"Please don't be disappointed with me daddy but I don't want to go to Harvard." Clarke said quickly so she could get it out in the open before she chickened out.

"What?" Her dad obviously hadn't expected that.

"I'm sorry I never said anything but it wasn't ever my top choice, Columbia was and I got accepted, I really want to go there but I've been so afraid to say anything because I didn't want to disappoint you and mom." Clarke didn't realize that she would get so emotional talking to her dad about this.

"Clarke you could never disappoint me, it doesn't matter what college you go to." Jake pulled her into a hug.

"There is one more thing." She told him while he still had her in a hug. "I'm a really good artist and I would love to take some art classes while I'm there."

When Jake pulled back he had love in his eyes "You do whatever you want to do, I know your mom will make it seem like the only option you have is to follow in her footsteps but it's not, I'll be proud of you no matter what you choose."

Clarke could feel her eyes watering "thank you so much, that's exactly what I needed to hear."

"So you any good?" He asked her with a grin that went ear to ear.

"My friends seem to think so." She told him.

"Can I see?" She hadn't expected him to be interested.

Clarke really wasn't sure if she wanted to show her dad her sketchbook but that was all she had so far and she wanted him to be involved in this new part of her life.

"Yea." She told him then went and got her sketchbook.

As she handed it to him she knew he was about to know about the parts of her life that she had kept separate from her parents. Which hadn't been hard since they weren't ever around anyway. She watched his face as he went from page to page. He wasn't giving away anything but when he finally looked back at her she saw that he had tears in his eyes.

"I never knew you were so talented, how long have you been drawing?" He was proud of her.

"For a long time but I didn't start drawing people until a couple months ago."

"I see you had plenty of inspiration here." Jake smiled at his daughter.

"I've made some really good friends here." She knew that he suspected that she had made more than friends but he never mentioned it.

"Well if you want you can let Columbia know you've made your choice and I'll deal with your mom." Clarke knew her plan was to tell her herself but if her dad wanted to do it she wouldn't tell him no.

Clarke didn't know how better to show him how grateful she was but to throw her arms around him again. She didn't know what she would ever do without him.

XxXxXxXxXx

Once Jake told Clarke's mom her decision to go to Columbia, things went from bad to worse. Abby quit talking to both of them completely, she didn't think her mom would go that low but she was wrong. The more her mom shut them out the more her dad drank and stayed out all night. She knew her mom and dad had problems but she hated that she made it worse for the two of them. She knew how much her dad loved her mom.

The last week of April things got worse than Clarke thought possible. After seeing each other for almost 2 months Murphy and Emori became an official couple, like they planned to make it work after graduation couple. Clarke tried to pretend it didn't bother her but she knew she couldn't hide it, she was pretty sure that everyone knew how she felt about Murphy, even his girlfriend.

Clarke's mom had been trying to call her all day but after Murphy told her about him and Emori she really didn't want to talk to her mom. It wasn't until school was out that she finally listened the messages that she had left. Her mom was upset, really upset which scared the shit out of her.

She finally called her back and the moment she answered she knew something was wrong.

"What's going on mom?" She got right to it.

"Clarke there's been an accident." Her mom took a deep breath "Your dad…"

She didn't get a chance to finish because Clarke interrupted her "don't say it, don't you dare say something happened to him."

"Clarke I'm so sorry, we did everything we could." She could tell by her voice that she was hurting.

"No… Why would you tell me something like that? There is nothing wrong with him, he'll be home soon." Clarke was in denial.

"Baby he's gone." Clarke didn't want to hear that, she didn't want to hear a word that her mother said.

"You're wrong." She hung up the phone and immediately started crying.

Clarke wasn't sure how long she was laying on the ground before she heard the doorbell. She attempted to tell whoever it was to go away but no words came. When she heard the door open she couldn't believe who it was, it was her next door neighbor that she hadn't saw in months.

She finally found her voice, "what are you doing here?"

"Your mom thought you might need a friend." He said as he walked closer to her than sat next to her on the floor.

"I think she sent the wrong person then." She knew it sounded cruel but she wasn't in the mood to make someone else feel better about themselves.

"I said the same thing." He chuckled "But I guess she has no idea who you hang out with around here."

"She doesn't know me at all." And that was the truth, her mom didn't know her one bit.

"You want me to call someone for you? Someone that you actually like." He was trying to lighten the mood.

She shook her head "You'll do fine."

Bellamy didn't leave Clarke's side, he stayed put on the floor next to her until it got so dark that he couldn't ever see her in front of him anymore. After tripping a few times trying to find the light switch he finally got it and was surprised to see Clarke sitting up once the light was on.

"You alright?" He asked and knew right away that it was the wrong thing to say.

The tears started streaming down her cheeks and Bellamy was by her side holding her. "This can't be happening, he can't be gone."

He pulled her in tighter.

Bellamy got Clarke to the couch and found a blanket to cover her up with. It was getting late and he knew she was exhausted. After putting the blanket over her he tried to move to the chair but Clarke grabbed ahold of him. "Please don't leave me."

Bellamy had never seen Clarke so broken and he couldn't find it in him to move to the chair so he laid next to her with his arm around her torso. They both fell asleep pretty quickly, Clarke didn't think she would be able to sleep but for some reason with Bellamy so close she drifted right off.

Bellamy was sound asleep and was woken up by Clarke thrashing around in her sleep. He grabbed ahold of her, stilling her then tried to calm her down. It took a few minutes but he finally succeeded. At first she seemed like she was just getting back to a peaceful dream but then she opened her eyes.

"Did I wake you?" She said softly.

"I was already awake." He tried to lie.

"You're a bad liar." She smiled which was the first time since she found out about her dad.

He just laid there staring at her, he took his hand and brushed her hair from her face. Bellamy knew he shouldn't have done it but it didn't stop him, he leaned down and lightly kissed her. She automatically moved her hands to his hair and deepened their kiss. They both knew that this would be just another mistake that they make but Clarke wanted to think about anything but her father's death and having sex with Bellamy was a nice distraction.

The experience Clarke had with Bellamy this time around was so much more fulfilling than it had been last time. She was surprised he didn't take off as soon as they finished, they actually laid there wrapped in each other's naked bodies and eventually they fell asleep.

Clarke was still pretty much out of it when she heard the front door open, she could see the light through her closed eyelids so she knew it was already morning. She knew she was supposed to be in school right now but there was no way in hell that she was going to go in.

As soon as she remembered she wasn't alone her eyes flew open just in time to see Raven and Murphy walking through the doorway. The moment Raven saw her and Bellamy she said "oh shit" then turned around but Murphy kept staring at them which made her more than a little uncomfortable. She was able to get the blanket and cover them up the best she could.

Raven finally turned back around "I'm sorry we didn't mean to just barge in, we knew something was wrong when you didn't show up to school but when we found out what happened we had to come by to make sure you were alright."

Clarke looked down at Bellamy who was still sleeping. "Bellamy wake up." She pretty much had to yell at him to get him up.

When he opened his eyes he smiled at her, "how you feeling?"

"Uh, we have guests." She pointed behind him.

He turned around and the moment he saw Raven and Murphy standing there he attempted to cover himself even more with the blanket which took it off Clarke. She looked at him in disbelief then just decided to reach over him and grab her clothes off the ground.

When her eyes met Murphy's he was glaring at her. She asked "What's your problem?"

"Bellamy huh? I guess that shows where we are on your important list." Murphy was obviously pissed.

Clarke didn't know what it was about the situation but it made her laugh, here she was now with only a shirt on laughing as hard as she ever had. The moment she was able to calm herself down enough to look around the room she noticed she had 3 sets of eyes on her.

"I'm sorry but I don't think either of you could have given me what I got from him last night." Clarke said that more directed toward Murphy.

"This isn't what you should have been doing, you should have been with your friends, not with someone who would take advantage of you." Murphy had his eyes on Bellamy.

"He didn't take advantage of me." She slipped her shorts on and finally stood up and walked a little closer to Murphy "And hey you wanna know a little secret he's not even the one I wanted but since he obviously wants nothing to do with me I guess I had to go to second best."

When Clarke turned around just by the expression on Bellamy's face she knew she had hurt his feelings but she really didn't care. She picked up his clothes and tossed them to him "You need to get dressed and get out of here. Thanks for last night though."

Bellamy got dressed and left without even looking back at her. She knew she shouldn't have acted like that toward Bellamy when he was the one that helped her get through that first night. She wasn't sure how she would have done without him. She would worry about apologizing later and hope he forgave her.

* * *

 _And a little more Bellarke... I know I know, I keep falling back on them but it will be gradually changing._


	7. Chapter 6

**_This chapter is rated M.._**

 ** _There is more descriptive sex in this chapter than has been in any other. It's actually only a couple paragraphs and honestly I dont even know if its enough to make say M but I just wanted to be sure. If you read I entered in where it starts and stops. It's really not much.  
_**

 _Acharn, it made me sad even writing that part but I knew when I started this, he was going to die..._

 _Heidi, I know she was a complete ass to Bellamy even after he really helped her through that first night.  
_

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Chapter 6

Clarke really wasn't sure how she even made it through the last month of school, if she hadn't been taking pretty much all elective classes by this point she would have been in trouble. Her dad's death really messed her up and if her friends weren't as awesome as they were than she would have had nothing left by the time school ended. She and Murphy had drifted some but nothing to major that she worried it wasn't repairable. She just couldn't keep her mouth closed anymore about how she felt and he couldn't deal with it especially since he was trying to make it work with Emori.

Raven hadn't left her side, which kind of made Clarke feel bad because she had been skipping classes which meant that she was also and Raven wasn't advanced in her classes like Clarke was. If she wasn't with Raven she was having casual sex with Bellamy, it had become a thing. She made it clear that it wouldn't be anything other than that and he said it was like a dream come true, having the part that he likes best in a relationship and not have to worry about the other parts. Bellamy had never asked who she meant that first day after her dad died so she never told him but she was pretty sure that he had a feeling it was Murphy.

It was finally graduation day and Clarke couldn't be happier she had been waiting for this day so she could get out of Arkadia and get to New York. She already had her stuff packed and an apartment waiting on her and Raven. Since they were going to be going to school so close to each other neither of them could imagine living with anyone else.

The day went by so quickly and she was surprised that her mom had actually shown up at the graduation. She had seriously only saw her three times in the last month, only three times since her dad died. She realized right then that her mother really was horrible and that she would never be like her. She smiled and pretended she was happy to see her just to keep up appearances and the whole fact that she was the one forking up the bill for college and the apartment. She could hate her internally.

Clarke decided she was going to have a huge party after graduation and since her mom went back to the hospital it made it that easy. This would be her last night in Virginia, the last night of her old life and the last night that she would fuck up as a child. Once this part was over she would be an adult even though she wouldn't legally be an adult for a couple more months.

The party was bigger than she had anticipated but she didn't mind the extra bodies. She had a drink in her hand pretty much the entire night and was dancing with so many different people, girls or boys it didn't matter. She hadn't seen Murphy most the night so when she saw him walking toward her it instantly made her happy.

"I was wondering where you went." She slurred "Will you dance with me Murph… Please…"

Every time he smiled she felt like it was for her and her alone and tonight was no different. Clarke began dancing with him just as she had been dancing with the rest which wasn't innocent at all and the way his hands held her hips she couldn't help but enjoy it so much more than she should have. She knew it was a low move but she turned so her back was to him and started rubbing her ass all over his groin and she felt his reaction immediately which made her do it even more. His grip tightened on her hips, pulling her even tighter to his body. They went on like this for a good hour before he finally excused himself.

 **(This is where it becomes descriptive)**

She knew she shouldn't do it but she followed him and when he went into the bathroom she snuck right in behind him and quietly closed the door behind her and locked it. For a moment she thought he had heard her but when he dropped his pants and ran his hand over his erection she knew that she was wrong. She stood there and debated on what she was going to do and after watching him stroke himself a few times she couldn't help herself. She made her way behind him and wrapped her arms around him and took his erection into her hands. His eyes flew open and he looked back and saw Clarke standing there. "Clarke."

"Shh…" Was all she said before she walked around him and got onto her knees and took him into her mouth. This was all completely new to her so she didn't know what she was doing exactly but hearing the moans coming from Murphy's mouth she had a feeling she was doing something right.

Clarke was surprised when he stopped her before he came. She honestly thought it was because he had finally got a clear mind and realized what was happening shouldn't have been. But she was completely wrong, he didn't pull up his pants, he pretty much tore hers off and hoisted her up on the sink and kissed her. She never thought she would feel his lips on hers and she sure the hell never figured she'd feel him inside her so when both happened within a few seconds of each other she was beyond excited.

 **(End of rated M)**

Clarke had no idea how long they were in the bathroom but she didn't care, she didn't attempt to be quiet and if anyone came knocking at the door she would yell at them that she was getting laid and to find the other bathroom. When they finally finished Murphy just pulled his pants back up threw on his shirt and left the bathroom. He didn't even speak to her after which really hurt because she knew there was something there, she knew by the way he looked at her and the way he held her.

After standing there in complete shock for a few minutes she finally got dressed and made her way back to her party. Which she realized automatically that it had dwindled down to only a few people. When she looked at the clock she couldn't believe what time it said, it was 2 in the morning. That meant that she and Murphy had been going at it for so much longer than she had realized.

Once the last few were heading out she looked around for Raven and was disappointed when she didn't find her. She must have left and Clarke really needed to talk to her. She grabbed her phone and sent her a message. She was surprised when she read her response and she was still there but she had already went and laid down. She made sure the rest of the guests were gone and locked up then went upstairs and saw Raven laying in her bed, she dropped down next to her.

"What did you do?" Raven asked with a chuckle.

"Why is it always my doing?" Clarke asked trying to figure out how to tell her best friend that she had just slept with their other best friend.

"Cause you've been doing a lot of not Clarke like things here lately." Raven said as she turned and faced her.

"You mean like having sex with Murphy?" Clarke said all nonchalantly.

"That was Murphy?" Raven pretty much shouted than sat up.

Clarke nodded "What did I do? He's probably never going to speak to me again."

"Well good thing we're going to New York tomorrow then huh." Raven said all matter of a factly.

"Yea but he'll be in New York to, you'll be going to school with him, it's not like I'll never see him again." Clarke was already kicking herself in the ass for making the decision she did.

"Oh well Clarke at least you got it out of the way, maybe that'll help you get over him so now you'll be able to move on with some smart hottie from Columbia." Raven might have been a little drunk but she made a lot of sense to Clarke.

"I'll have to do something about my bruised ego, he just left once we were done, I didn't even get a thank you." Clarke was full of giggles.

"No thank you huh? Damn him for not being polite. Doesn't he know you're supposed to tell the person you just slept with thank you before taking off." Raven joined in with the laughing. Clarke was glad they could kid about this now because she knew once morning came the situation will be completely different.

XxXxXxXxXx

The next few days Clarke and Raven were so busy they didn't even have time to talk about what had happened with Murphy. Clarke didn't know what to expect but it wasn't complete radio silence. She figured he would have called or at least sent her a text. She knew she was the one who initiated the entire thing so that was on her. She just figured she would have gotten something telling her how pissed he was but it didn't come.

Raven had spoken to Murphy on a few occasion but they didn't bring Clarke up. After they were finally all unpacked and sitting watching TV she decided to text Murphy.

 _-Thank U_

 _-4 what?_

 _-Not being a complete ass after I made a fool out of myself_

 _-UR welcome_

Clarke couldn't help but laugh which got Raven's attention.

 _-So we good?_

 _-Completely, sometimes friends do stupid shit and that's what we'll have to chalk it up to_

 _-Works for me but I like to do stupid shit sometimes ;)_

 _-R U flirting with me?_

 _-I could be but only if u don't mind_

 _-Oh I don't mind one bit, boosts the ego_

 _-Oh yea, I could do a lot of that_

They did a lot more of the cheesy texting back and forth before Clarke finally looked up at Raven and noticed she was staring at her. "What?"

"You've got it bad." Raven just laughed then put her focus back on the TV but her words stuck in Clarke's head. She did actually believe that she had it bad, she realized right then that she didn't want anyone else but Murphy.


	8. Chapter 7

_Thank you for your review Heidi as always you're awesome :D_

 _Hope everyone is enjoying!_

* * *

Chapter 7

The end of July was approaching and Clarke knew since it was her 18th birthday Raven had planned a small party for her. She honestly wasn't sure who would even come since they had just moved to New York and hadn't really met many people yet. Murphy was still in Virginia and wouldn't be able to get out to New York until the end of August so she knew that he wasn't going to be able to make it. Clarke couldn't help but feel disappointed the only person that she actually wanted to see on her birthday she wouldn't be able to. She hadn't seen Murphy since they hooked up in the bathroom of her mom's house. They had talked a lot, in her opinion a lot more than regular friends do but since he was stuck in Virginia for the time being they haven't been able to see each other.

"You need to get dressed, were going to be late for dinner." Raven ordered as she walked into Clarke's room.

"Ugh I know, I don't know what to wear." Clarke said with a light laugh.

Raven looked at what she had laid out on the bed and shook her head, "That's what you're going to give me."

Clarke looked from her friend to the bed "What's wrong with them?"

"This is a special day, you need to look special." Raven smiled as she turned around looking through her closet.

She pulled out a red dress that Clarke had thought was a little too dressy for this kind of occasion.

"Really?" Clarke looked at her in disbelief.

"Hell yea, you look awesome in this and since it's your birthday you want all the boys in the room looking at you." It seemed like Raven was up to something but Clarke let it go, she put on the red dress then looked to Raven for approval, and Clarke knew she had it when she smiled.

XxXxXxXxXx

When they arrived at the restaurant Clarke couldn't help but notice how nice the place was. She looked around the place then to Raven. "You seriously made reservations here?"

"Yup." Raven said all excited.

The hostess took them to their table, she immediately sat down but noticed that Raven was all fidgety.

"What are you doing?" Clarke asked her.

"Uh nothing." She said but obviously she was up to something.

"Raven." Clarke said a little loudly.

Raven looked around one more time before she looked back at Clarke then she whispered "shit."

Clarke was about to say something else but it never came, she just happened to look at the door just as a certain someone that she hadn't saw in far too long walked through the door. He skimmed the room obviously looking for them and the moment that his eyes met hers it was like everything else disappeared, she felt like her heart was about to beat out of her chest. Finally she was able to take in everything about him, he was dressed up, John Murphy had dressed up to have dinner with them. She knew she was probably smiling like an idiot but she didn't care.

Murphy made his way to their table and that when Clarke noticed something, there was only two place setting at the table. She finally took her eyes off Murphy and looked back at Raven and she finally put two and two together, Raven had set her up on a date with Murphy. When he reached the table Clarke stood and he took her in his arms. It was so good to feel his arms around her.

"Happy birthday Princess." He whispered in her ear.

When they finally separated Raven was just staring at them finally after about a minute she said "Well I'm going to get out of here."

Murphy looked confused "Where are you going?"

She shrugged her shoulders "I don't know yet, just not here."

Clarke let out a light laugh once Raven walked away "I think she's trying to make this a date."

The expression that crossed his face next wasn't something that Clarke liked seeing.

"Hey don't freak out on me now, I never said I wanted this to be a date, I understand that this is just a friendship." Clarke assured him even though she didn't actually believe it.

Murphy finally seemed to relax and sat down.

"Well this is a surprise." Clarke finally said "I didn't think you'd be able to get up here for my birthday."

"Well my boss loves me so I was able to talk him into letting me have the weekend off." He smirked which made Clarke laugh.

"You have a way with getting people to love you." Clarke said before she thought about what she was saying. "I just meant that you have a way with people, not that anyone in particular loves you, not that I do or anything."

Clarke just shut her mouth and knew she just made this completely awkward. The waitress came up just in time and asked them if they were ready to order. They both ordered and as soon as they were alone they didn't even make eye contact.

Clarke took a deep breath "I didn't mean anything by that, I don't love you not like that anyway, I do love you like a friend though, just like I do Raven."

He looked up from the table and to Clarke "I don't know what this is between us Clarke but it's not just a friendship, I care about you in a different way than I do Raven."

Clarke didn't know how to respond to his confession, even though she knew there was something between them he would never admit it and now that he has she didn't know what to do with the information.

"I got back with Emori." Clarke couldn't believe her ears.

"What?" She said surprised.

He looked sad "she knows about what happened but she still wanted to try again, she's moving here to."

Clarke felt like her heart was being ripped from her chest, "why would you even tell me that you felt something for me if you were going to follow it up with that?"

"I needed you to know." Murphy was trying to make an excuse for his actions.

"I would have rather never known." She knew she shouldn't be so pissed but she couldn't help it.

"Things couldn't work between us." Murphy said and Clarke was starting to wonder if he was trying to convince himself and not her.

"Only because you won't give us the chance." Clarke knew that wasn't what she should have said but she did anyway.

Murphy didn't respond which didn't matter anyway since the waitress had just arrived with the food. They ate in silence, Clarke didn't know what to say. When the waitress brought the check Clarke didn't even attempt to grab it, she just gave Murphy a look than stood up and walked out of the restaurant. She knew it wasn't her best moment leaving him with the check but she was so hurt it made her do things she wouldn't normally do.

When she made it back to the apartment Raven wasn't home, which she couldn't help but be a little pissed about, it was Raven's fault that she was in this situation. Even though she knew it really wasn't her fault she needed someone to blame and since it was Raven who pushed her to admit her feelings for him she was the best option right now.

Clarke decided that she needed a night out to get her mind off Murphy. Anything to get him out of her head. While waiting on Raven to get home she took a shower, in all reality she had already taken one that morning but after everything that happened with Murphy she just felt like she needed to wash away the embarrassment.

As she was getting out she heard someone come in which she could only assume it was Raven.

"Raven?" She asked through the closed door as she was drying herself off.

"Yea." She responded.

"Just making sure it was you and not some random person coming into our apartment." Clarke sighed "I've already had a bad start to my birthday so I'd like to pick it up from here, no more shitty surprises."

"What do you mean shitty surprises?" Raven sounded confused.

"I mean you inviting Murphy here, worst mistake ever." Clarke knew she was being overly dramatic but she was allowed to be when she was talking to her best friend.

Clarke heard Raven mumbling something but couldn't understand what she was saying.

Clarke wrapped the towel around her and opened the door as she said "I couldn't hear you."

As soon as the door was open she realized the reason she couldn't hear her was because she hadn't been talking to her, she had been talking to someone else. Someone who was standing next to Raven looking guilty as hell staring at Clarke.

"Oh yea Clarke I brought Murphy back with me." Raven said jokingly trying to relieve some of the tension in the room.

Clarke glared at both of them then turned and walked a very reasonable speed to her bedroom and slammed the door just a little harder than normal. She wanted them to know she was pissed but not excessively so.

She heard a knocking on her door then it slowly opening, she was glad that it was only Raven because she was now standing there in just her bra and panties. Raven pushed the door so it pretty much closed then walked further into her room.

"I didn't know." She looked upset. "I would have never done that if I would have known, I would have still invited him but I wouldn't have done that."

Clarke sat down on her bed "I don't understand why he hadn't told me before now, we have been talking every day, I honestly thought it was more than it obviously was."

Raven pulled her into a hug just as she heard her bedroom door open. Clarke couldn't help but chuckle, she could only imagine what the situation looked like, she and Raven were sitting on her bed hugging and all Clarke had on was her bra and panties. Murphy stopped as soon as he saw them and just stared.

"What you wanna get in on this to?" Clarke couldn't believe that she was actually making a joke.

"Uh… I just wanted…" Clarke had never seen Murphy struggle when he talked.

Raven had released Clarke and they were both just staring at Murphy.

"You act like you've never seen me like this before, it's nothing new Murph so stop acting like some scared little girl." Clarke really wasn't sure where she got the confidence but she was going with it.

Murphy just eyed her and if she had to admit it, she was kinda digging the way he was looking at her.

When he finally slowly made his way back out of the room, Clarke and Raven looked at each other and both started laughing.

"Well that was awkward." Raven said between laughs.

Clarke agreed and then she got dressed. She told Raven about her plan on going out and Raven agreed that it was a good idea. Raven also informed her that Murphy was going to be staying with them the weekend since he didn't have a place yet. Clarke didn't like the idea but she would deal, it is what friends do right. They deal with awkward as hell situations just to keep up appearances.


	9. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

It took Clarke longer than usual to get ready, she knew in the back of her mind that was because she was trying to impress the boy that sat on the other side of her door. She shook her head knowing she needed to just get over the stupid crush but was having a hell of a time doing that. She hoped having a night out would help with just that but with him tagging along she wasn't so sure.

Clarke gave herself a once over than walked out her bedroom door when she heard a whistle come from Raven she smiled. "Damn Clarke you know you're going to drive the boys wild tonight."

She couldn't help but sneak a glance at Murphy who was trying his best to not look at her. Which made her smile once again, she loved the fact that she could have an effect on him as well. It sucked that he refused to actually give them a chance but she wasn't going to waste the rest of her summer pinning over some guy who obviously wants someone else.

"That's the plan!" Clarke winked at Raven and completely ignored Murphy.

XxXxXxXxXx

When they arrived at the club Clarke was ready to party, she was officially 18, officially an adult, and she officially would never have to see her mother again if she chose that way. She, Raven and Murphy made their way to a table and Raven went to get them some drinks.

Murphy just kept glancing at Clarke finally after the 3rd time Clarke said "What?"

"I'm sorry about earlier." He said softly.

"You know what Murphy its fine, I know I was a little emotional earlier but I'm over it, we're here to have a good time for my birthday and that's exactly what I intend to do." Clarke gave him a slight smile, she would not let him ruin her night.

Raven made her way back to the table with a couple drinks and a couple shots. When Clarke looked her way all she did was smirk.

"It appears your trying to get me drunk." Clarke said after she sat the drinks down on the table.

"It's your birthday, hell yea I'm trying to get you drunk." Raven shouted.

An hour passed and Clarke had a good buzz going on, she was having a good time, even with Murphy there. She promised herself that she wouldn't allow the awkwardness between them ruin her night and so far it had been a success.

"Clarke Griffin?" She heard a male's voice from behind her, the voice was familiar but she couldn't put her finger on who it belonged to.

When she turned around she couldn't believe her eyes, Wells Jaha was standing about 5 feet from her. "What are you doing here?"

"I go to school here, I heard that you turned Harvard down but I didn't believe it but here you are in New York." Well said with a smile then he pulled her into a hug.

Clarke couldn't smile enough, Wells had been her only friend before she had moved to Arkadia. They weren't as close as she had gotten with Raven but he was the only thing she would have called anything other than an acquaintance back home.

She saw Wells staring behind her as she released him, when she turned she saw Raven and Murphy staring at the newest addition.

"Wells, these are my friends" she looked at Wells and immediately they both started laughing.

"You actually made some friends? Hell I've known you since we were babies and I don't think I've ever even seen you speak to anyone other than me." He took his arm and placed it across her shoulders.

"I know I know, I don't know how it happened" She giggled "I met them back in Arkadia and even with all my weirdness they still liked me."

Wells looked from Raven to Murphy and extended his hand to Raven first "Wells."

Raven smiled then took his hand "Raven."

Then he extended it to Murphy who just stared at him, without moving.

"Really Murphy." Clarke snorted.

He finally shook Wells hand and once the whole awkward thing was over Wells looked back to Clarke. "What no Bellamy?"

Clarke couldn't help but bust out laughing, after last summer she had shared with him what had happened with Bellamy. "Shut up Wells, you know we don't talk anymore."

Raven started cracking up "yea but that only stopped because you moved to New York, you two were screwing like bunnies the whole last month of school."

Wells looked at her in disbelief "wait a minute you two hooked up again after last summer?"

"Thanks Raven." She said to Raven then turned back to look at Wells "he was there just to help me deal."

Wells looked at her understanding, of course he had heard about her father's death. "Yea but there's no way that it meant nothing, you have been in love with him for years."

This got the attention of both Raven and Murphy. Neither of them had known of the crush that she had on Bellamy since she was 13.

"What's that?" Raven said obviously not liking that she had been left out.

"Oh yea, she'd come back after spending the summers in Arkadia and all I would hear about for months is Bellamy this Bellamy that." He chuckled "As soon as I thought she had finally shut up about him it was almost summer time again so then it was all about how excited she was."

They heard a laugh coming from behind them and Clarke couldn't believe her eyes when she turned around. "You've got to be kidding me, what the hell are you two doing in New York?"

Bellamy and Octavia Blake stood behind them. When Clarke looked at Bellamy she immediately felt her face turning beat red. She turned away from them which happened to be worse because now she was staring into Murphy's very pissed off blue eyes.

"Well your mom told us it was your birthday and told us that we should come out here and surprise you, well let's just say we had major issues getting here so by the time we made it to your apartment you weren't home and someone directed us here." Octavia was the one who answered.

That surprised Clarke so she looked back to Octavia "who told you we were here? No one knew we were going to be here."

Raven cleared her throat "uh that would have been me, I figured you'd like to have more people that you actually know around for your birthday."

"Really… Really… You thought I would want Bellamy here?" Clarke said without really thinking what she was saying.

"Thanks for that, makes me feel welcome." Bellamy sounded kind of pissed and Clarke understood exactly why he would be.

"I'm sorry we just left things kinda weird, this is unexpected." Clarke finally said.

"If you mean you hooking up with Murphy when we said that we wouldn't sleep with anyone else while we were sleeping together, leaving things kinda weird than yea that's exactly how we left things." Bellamy was pissed and Clarke hadn't even thought about him since the incident with Murphy then moving to New York.

Clarke felt bad, really bad and she didn't know what to say to make things any better. All she could think to say is "I'm sorry."

Wells looked from Clarke to Bellamy than to Murphy, finally his eyes were back on Clarke. "So you've hooked up with both of them?"

Clarke huffed "Can we please not talk about this, it is my birthday."

The mood had obviously changed around their group, too much information had been shared and Clarke wasn't too happy about it, her and Wells would have a serious conversation about that later. She stood there for a few minutes and when no one would say a word she was finally so fed up with the whole situation she turned around and walked away from them and to the bar.

Clarke felt someone follow her but when she turned around she hadn't expected to see Bellamy. "What? You want to tell me how much of a horrible person I am?"

He put his arm around her shoulders "you're not a horrible person, you were just confused." He smirked "So you've been in love with me for years huh?"

She couldn't help but laugh then rolled her eyes. "I was too young to be in love, maybe a little infatuated though."

"But not anymore?" He tried to play it off like he was joking but she could hear it in his voice that he was seriously asking.

"I think I shifted my attention elsewhere." She said looking over Bellamy's shoulder to Murphy. "But it seems like I have a tendency to care for guys who don't want the same thing I do."

Bellamy gave her an understanding look. "Well if it makes you feel any better, I did care for you to. I knew I shouldn't have because I was with Gina but I did. And I know it's not my place but he cares for you to, I don't know why he's hiding from it but it's obvious."

Clarke looked past Bellamy again to her group and her eyes went right to Murphy this time he was staring back at her. She felt the need to look away but she didn't, not right away anyway. When she finally did she looked back at Bellamy.

"He told me earlier that he did care for me then went to tell me that he got back with Emori." Clarke said knowing she sounded down.

"Well I guess that's his loss and maybe I can pretend it's my gain." Bellamy smirked.

She looked at him confused "What do you mean?"

"Well that was a jackass move, if you're not going to be with someone than why the hell do you tell them you care about them, especially if you know they really care about you." Bellamy snaked his arm around her waist "maybe if he thinks you're actually trying to move on then he'll finally realized exactly what you mean to him."

Clarke was seriously considering his offer but had ultimately decided she didn't want to do it like that. Not only would it make things awkward with Murphy which she didn't want but it would just confuse things with Bellamy. Too bad she never got the chance to tell Bellamy what she though because he just pulled her to him and pressed his lips against hers, she was so stunned and actually didn't move for a good few seconds but then out of habit she kissed him back.

Once Clarke's brain finally started working again she pulled back from Bellamy and more than a little pissed. "Really?"

Bellamy just smirked then walked away. She didn't want to look over at the table, she didn't want to see what her friends thought about the kiss. But more than that she didn't want to see Murphy's face.

Clarke ordered her drink along with a couple shots. She downed the shots before going back to the table. When she finally turned around she saw all of her friends were talking and laughing and she hoped that somehow they missed the kiss. But she knew the moment her eyes connected with Murphy's when she was walking back to the table that he had saw it. She cursed Bellamy to herself.

As soon as she made her way back to the table Octavia said "so you and my brother huh?"

 _Shit,_ she though obviously no one had missed it. "No he just thought he'd be a smartass since my pal over here wanted to go tell everyone that I use to be sooo in love with him."

Wells grinned.

"Stop smiling." She said and couldn't help but smile herself "you've only been around for what an hour and already you're spilling all my secrets, good thing I didn't trust you with anything I actually didn't want anyone to know."

Everyone laughed, everyone except that one person and she had a feeling he would never look at her the same again.

* * *

 _And enter Wells... I hadn't originally planned on adding him to the story but as I was writing he just kind of made himself present lol  
_

 _And once again a little Bellarke.. But that will be the last in this story..._


	10. Chapter 9

_Of course first off I want to thank Heidi for your review :)_

 _Also I want to thank each and every other person who is reading this, even if you don't review :)_

 _I hope everyone enjoys this chapter!_

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Chapter 9

Clarke had gotten pretty drunk the night before but it was her birthday so she thought she deserved it. What she didn't think she deserved was how Murphy acted. He had completely ignored her the rest of the night, she was furious at Bellamy for doing that.

The combination of a really bad hangover and still being pissed wasn't for a good morning. Clarke climbed out of bed and went straight to the kitchen, needing aspirin and water, as soon as possible. As she was pouring the water she heard someone walking up behind her.

She turned around and saw Murphy who had obviously just woken up and she couldn't help but smile at the site, his dark hair was all over the place, his blue eyes were barley open obviously still half asleep. "Good morning."

"Hey look he does still speak to me." Clarke said in a sarcastic tone but with a smile to let him know she was joking.

Murphy rolled his eyes than went and grabbed a cup of his own, also taking a few aspirins.

"Just so you know he only did that to make you jealous." Clarke wasn't sure why but she felt like she needed him to know that.

He looked back to her "why would he do that?"

"Because he's an ass." Clarke laughed. "Actually I don't know why exactly, all I know we were standing there talking about you then he kissed me and I just wanted to hit him in his smug face."

Of course Clarke knew the actual reason he did it but she didn't feel like she needed to share that with him.

"What did you tell him?" He was looking at her suspiciously.

His response kind threw her, "What?"

"If he did it to make me jealous then you obviously told him something." He actually seemed like he was getting somewhat pissed.

"Seriously Murphy, have you ever thought maybe I didn't have to tell him shit because it isn't only me who sees the way you act around me? He couldn't understand why we weren't together, so yea I told him you had a girlfriend that we were just friends but he didn't believe it. Obviously he knows how I feel about you, everyone does, and he just assumed that it was mutual. But I had to make sure he knew just how wrong he was because I wouldn't want anyone to think you might actually like me." Clarke let her interaction with Murphy get to her, she knew she shouldn't have but she felt like shit and was done arguing with him.

Clarke was almost back to her room when she heard Murphy clear his throat then say "Do you care for him?"

When Clarke turned around she could see the pain in his eyes, it was obvious it was hard for him to ask "It doesn't matter does it?"

Clarke knew she shouldn't have answered him like that but she was so aggravated. She was ready to just get this summer over with and start school. She would be so busy with the medicine and doing her art in all of her free time that she wouldn't have any time to think about boys anymore.

XxXxXxXxXx

It was about a week later and Clarke had missed a call from a number she hadn't recognized. She walked into her apartment and went to check her voicemail.

"Miss Griffin this is Mr. Jacobs, I have an important matter to speak to you about please give me a call back at…" and he left his number.

Clarke looked at Raven who had been listening to the call with her. "I wonder who that was."

"I have no clue." She replied.

Clarke figured the best way to figure out who he is would be to call him back. She dialed the number and when the secretary answered the phone she knew it was a law firm.

"Uh I missed a call from Mr. Jacobs." Clarke said not really knowing what to say.

"Can I tell him whose calling?" She asked politely.

"This is Clarke Griffin." She answered.

"Oh Miss Griffin he's been waiting on your call all morning, let me get him for you." She said way to cheery.

Now Clarke was even more confused, why would a lawyer be trying to get ahold of her?

"Miss Griffin, thank you so much for getting back with me." Mr. Jacobs said as he answered the phone.

"Well it sounded important so I thought I should." She tried to make light of her nervousness.

"It is rather important and if you would come to the office today I would really like to speak to you face to face." Clarke couldn't help but imagine what the man looked like that she was speaking to and she couldn't help but picture a heavyset older man who was balding.

"Sure what time?" She asked.

"Would you be available around 2?" He asked after a slight paused.

"Yep." Clarke responded immediately "sooo where am I going exactly?"

Mr. Jacobs gave her the address to the law firm and after thanking her, disconnected the call.

As soon as the call ended Raven asked "did he say what it was about?"

Clarke shook her head, she had no idea. The only thing she did know was she wasn't going to go alone, Raven was going to come along whether she wanted to or not.

She was glad when Raven gladly agreed to go with her. She was pretty sure that she wouldn't have said no but she had been so wrong about Murphy she kept waiting for the shoe to drop with Raven.

XxXxXxXxXx

They made it to the lawyers office about 15 minutes early and was surprised that they took them straight back to his office. Clarke knew that he was surprised to see that Clarke had brought a friend but he never said anything.

He looked straight at Clarke and said "Miss Griffin it's so nice to officially meet you."

Clarke shook his hand, "uh you to I guess."

Mr. Jacobs just laughed.

Clarke and Raven followed him into his office and sat in the chairs across from him.

"So I bet you're curious why you are here today." He said

Clarke just nodded.

He took a deep breath than said "I am actually your father's lawyer, Miss Griffin."

That had Clarke's attention.

"He had a policy separate from the one he had with your mother that would go to you in case something happened to him." Mr. Jacobs explained.

Clarke just stared at him wanting him to continue.

"The reason I haven't called you before now is because the policy stipulated that you must be 18 and enrolled in college and since your 18th birthday just passed I thought it was time we met." He older man held a small smile.

"What kind of policy is it?" Clarke was curious.

"Your father actually started a bank account in your name right after you were born and up until he passed had been adding money to it regularly, then he also had an insurance policy that named you beneficiary." He told her.

Clarke wanted to know how much it was but she didn't know if it was inappropriate to ask.

"So how much we talking here?" Raven said all nonchalantly with a small smile.

"Miss Griffin you will be receiving around 500 thousand once your tuition is paid." He sat some papers in front of her, it showed the accounts and it had all the information for an art degree at Columbia.

Clarke started crying almost immediately, her dad wanted her to go to school for what she wanted to. She couldn't believe he set everything up like he had.

Mr. Jacobs gave her a small smile "he had all this set up before his accident, he wanted you to have a choice."

Raven grabbed ahold of Clarke and held her why she cried.

"There is one more thing that I need to address." He handed her one stack of papers that had been sitting in front of him, the first thing Clarke noticed was the building on the first page it looked like an apartment building.

"What's that?" Clarke was curious.

"It's yours if you want it, it's actually a duplex that was once three separate apartments but the moment your dad knew you wanted to be at Columbia he found a place for you and since he also knew you had a few friends that would also be in New York with you he wanted to make sure there was enough space for all of them." Just by the way he spoke about her father Clarke was starting to realize that they might have been friends as well.

Raven was staring at the paper with Clarke, they were both reading the description. Raven finally said "5 bedrooms and over 2000 square feet… That's a lot of space Clarke."

Clarke just sat there staring at the paper, she couldn't believe her dad did this for her. She had no clue, now she was wondering if this was why he hadn't been around so much lately trying to get all this set up for her.

"He was a really good man, you dad." Mr. Jacobs said.

Clarke nodded in agreement. "Were you two friends?"

"I've known Jake for many years, I would have considered us friends." He said sincerely.

"I can't believe he did all this for me, he told me he supported me but I really didn't think he did, not so much to do this for me." Clarke had started getting emotional again.

"He loved you very much, you were the reason he worked so hard, he wanted to make sure you had everything you would ever need." She heard the emotion in his voice.

XxXxXxXxXx

Clarke got the key from Pete, Mr. Jacobs, for her new place before leaving his office. There wasn't any way she was going to give it up when her dad went through so much to make sure she had it. She and Raven decided to go straight over.

As soon as they pulled up in front of the place she felt her eyes starting to water again. Raven waited with her patiently until she was ready, she grabbed ahold of her hand and that's how they walked to the door. Since Clarke's hand was shaking so much Raven unlocked the door for her.

They walked around the already furnished house and even Raven started getting emotional, it was a lot to take in and Raven wasn't one to get stuff like this. The apartment that she and Clarke shared was nice but it was nothing like this.

"I guess this is what the life of a princess is like." Raven joked.

They separated and were checking out the place, when Clarke heard Raven call her name she walked over to her and looked inside the open door that Raven was looking through. Clarke almost stopped breathing when she saw what was behind the door, it was an art studio, her studio. There was already an easel set up and she saw a note scribbled on a pad of paper sitting next to it.

 _To my Princess,_

 _You will never know the full extent of how proud I am of you growing up and becoming your own woman. I know your mother has always wanted you to be a certain way and as much as I'd like to see you become a doctor like she is, if it's not your passion then you shouldn't do it. I know she's not going to be happy once she finds out about this but she will get over it, I promise you. Just don't let her chose for you._

 _I know you don't need all this space and I went overboard but when I saw the place I could see you and your friends here, living it up, I think that's what the kids say nowadays. I also heard from Thelonious that Wells might be attending Columbia as well so I thought you could help him out as well, but that's up to you princess. This place is yours and you do with it what you want, just promise me you'll do what's in your heart._

 _I love you_

 _P.S. I thought this would be the perfect place for you to do all the artsy stuff you do. You know like draw that boy that you seem to really like to draw, what did I count 8 drawings of him?_

 _P.S.S. If that boy that I mentioned above is reading this all I have to say to you is, if you hurt my daughter I'll kill you!_

Clarke was in tears the moment she started reading the letter but couldn't help but laugh once she got to the end. She knew he caught on that she liked to draw a certain someone a little more than she did anyone else, even though he never said anything.


	11. Chapter 10

_Thank you Heidi for your review, glad you liked the letter. I thought it was cute lol._

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Chapter 10

Clarke and Raven spent the rest of the night in their new place, they ordered takeout and slept in the beds that were already there. By the time they went back to their apartment the next day Raven already had her room picked out and already knew exactly how she wanted the new room. All five rooms were on the second floor with the master being the only one to have a connected bathroom so of course that was Clarke's room. Raven chose the only other one with a walk-in closet and that was on the opposite end of the house. There was two other bedroom across from Ravens and then the final one was right next to the master, it was the only one that only had one small closet.

As soon as they were back at their apartment Clarke text Wells.

 _-Hey where you staying at in NY?_

 _-In the dorms why?_

 _-If you're interested I have a spare room, just help out with food & utilities?_

 _-Hell yea anything would be better than the shit dorm I'm stuck in_

She gave him the address and told him to meet them there in a few hours.

Clarke figured with the three of them there should be plenty to cover the cost of utilities and they would figure out the food part once they sat down and discussed everything.

XxXxXxXxXx

In the time it took before they met up with Wells they packed their stuff from the apartment, turned their keys in and was on their way to their new place. Since they were month to month they went ahead and paid that last month and told them the landlord they could go ahead and rent it to someone else.

Clarke was now sitting in their new living room looking around and seeing that it was finally looking more like home with her and Ravens things. When the doorbell rang Clarke went and let Wells in.

The moment he walked in he stopped dead in his tracks, "whoa, you'd never guess this place was this nice looking at the outside."

Clarke just laughed and then Raven walked down the stairs and joined them.

"How you like our digs Jaha?" Raven said with a smirk.

"Please don't call me that." He laughed "That's what a lot of people call my dad."

"Can do." She replied.

Wells looked around "So how'd you guys end up with a place like this?"

"Actually its mine." Clarke said straight-faced.

"What do you mean it's yours? Like your renting it yours or it's yours yours?" Wells looked at her curiously.

"Like its mine mine." Clarke grinned.

"How in the hell do you have something like this?" He was shocked.

"I guess my dad secretly bought it for me, before his accident, I just found out about it yesterday but he left a note and he was pretty straight forward that he thought we needed to stick together." This was the first time she has been able to really talk about her dad and not instantly start crying.

Wells laughed "Only Jake could pull something like this off so your mom wouldn't know."

"He was the most important person in my life and now he's gone, it's going to be hard living the rest of my life never seeing him again but I'll be strong because I know that what he would want from me." Clarke finally felt clarity "I'm going to stop with all the dumb shit I've been doing and just focus on me."

By the next day Wells was completely moved in, when he picked one of the rooms by Raven Clarke was secretly happy because she had started thinking that she was going to use the smaller upstairs room to store her finished pieces. She knew that wasn't something she should think about quite yet since all she had done at that time is sketch some but she had a feeling that once she started her classes she would be doing nothing but drawing and painting. She knew within the next couple days she would withdraw from the medical part and she would be just an art student. She finally felt completely satisfied with how her life was turning out.

XxXxXxXxXx

Over the next month Clarke, Raven and Wells made the new place home, with only a week left until school started they set ground rules about noise and stuff. Wells was going into politics so he was going to be loaded with homework but Clarke really wasn't sure if mechanical engineers would be the same or not, she laughed at herself for not really having any idea.

They were all sitting in the living room watching a movie when Raven's phone rang, she looked down at the screen then walked out of the room. Clarke thought it was odd because she usually just answers it, it didn't matter if it would be distracting or not. But once she came back in like nothing happened Clarke just blew it off thinking it was just her imagination.

When the doorbell rang a half hour later Raven jumped up and rushed to the door, looking back and saying a silent sorry to Clarke. When she opened the door Murphy stood there with bags in hand. Clarke looked from Raven to Murphy not understanding what was going on.

When Murphy finally looked at Clarke and saw the confused look he looked back at Raven "You didn't talk to her did you?"

Raven smiled then looked back at Clarke "you remember how you said we could have house guests?"

"Seriously?" Clarke couldn't believe Raven actually thought she'd be ok with him staying there.

"He didn't have anywhere else to go and remember your dad said he wanted you to share this place with your friends who really need help and Clarke he really needs help right now, he has nowhere else to go." Raven was playing the card and she was playing it well.

"Emori will not be staying here to." Clarke said before she realized what she had actually said.

"That won't be a problem." Murphy finally spoke for the first time.

Their eyes met for just a split second before she focused on something else then she huffed and said "welcome home."

Murphy moved slowly into the house and told her "thank you."

Clarke nodded "go upstairs and you'll find one empty bedroom left, go ahead and put your stuff in there."

He nodded as he walked up the stairs. Clarke's eyes were on Raven the moment she was sure he was out of ear range. "Really? You don't think this will be awkward or anything?"

"I know I should have talked to you about this but he's been having it rough these last few weeks, he caught Emori cheating on him so things went real bad real quick, and since they were supposed to get a place together here it left him in a bind." Raven said softly.

Clarke huffed "I guess this is how it should have been anyway we were friends before anything else and obviously it was a mistake to ever try anything other than that."

Wells came up behind Clarke "Well if you want help taking your mind off him I could always help."

"Seriously Wells, I've already ruined one friendship that way, don't think I'm gonna let that happen again." She said as she slapped his arm.

Wells just laughed "you're not my type anyway."

Just as her and Wells were playing around Murphy walked back down the stairs and Clarke didn't know why but she immediately stopped and turned and looked away from him. She hated herself for not being able to be an adult about the whole situation, she knew she should just forget it and start over but for some reason she couldn't.

Wells walked toward Murphy "were going to have to team up if not these two will end up running this house."

"Hey it's my house I think I will run it." Clarke protested.

Wells put his arm around Murphy "not if we have anything to do about it."

Clarke couldn't help but smile at Wells for trying to include Murphy, he was trying to make him not feel completely out of place and she really did appreciate it. She wished that she could put her feelings aside and just go back to how they use to be but so far no luck.

XxXxXxXxXx

The last weekend before school started, they all decided to hit up the club before they were all so busy that they didn't have time for each other anymore. The last few days have made it easier for Clarke and Murphy, things still were awkward between them but it wasn't nearly as bad as it had been. Clarke made a pack with herself that as long as they were living together that she wouldn't allow anything to happen again, obviously things between them was too complicated to ever become anything more than friends. She realized it didn't matter how she thought she felt, it would never be good enough.

When they got to the club they found an empty table and went and sat down. Raven was all dressed up, Clarke had a feeling it had to do with a certain someone that she had met since being in New York but so far Raven wouldn't fess up. Clarke didn't really feel the need to get all fancy, she just threw on a pair of jeans and a red top. The shirt was kinda cute but nothing to grand.

The moment they sat down Clarke saw Raven looking around and couldn't help but laugh, which got the attention of everyone at the table. She kept her eyes on Raven who turned her lip up slightly.

"Turn around." Clarke said to Raven as she saw the dark blonde man that Raven had been previously looking for.

Raven looked at her confused then turned around, the moment she looked back at Clarke her face had developed a slight pink hue to it. Murphy and Wells just looked at the girls not understanding what the silent conversation that was going on between the two of them was about.

Clarke stood up "I'm gonna go get us some drinks."

She turned just as Murphy stood and followed her to the bar. "What was that about?" He asked as soon as he reached her.

"I think Raven has a little crush." Clarke said with a grin, she was happy that Raven seemed to finally be getting over Finn.

Murphy smiled "Seriously on who?"

Clarke scanned the room and saw that he had now approached Raven, Clarke pointed.

Murphy just nodded, he was happy for Raven. She and Finn had been a couple for a long time and he knew how hard it was going to be for her to move on and he was happy to see that she seemed to be in the early stages of finally doing that.

"What can I get for you?" Clarke turned around and ordered their drinks.

They walked back to the table, holding a drink in each hand. Chatting the entire time. It may have taken some time but she was pretty sure she had gotten her friend back.


	12. Chapter 11

_Thanks once again Heidi for your review :)_

 _Hope everyone had a great 4th!_

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Chapter 11

The next few months seemed to fly by, even though they all lived together Clarke felt like she never saw any of her roommates with the exception of Wells. Since they were both attending Columbia they made a pack that they would have lunch together every day. So that's exactly what they've done except now they've added a few more people.

Wells met Monty in the business class that he decided to take along with his politics classes. After a few classes together they pretty much became best friends. Clarke laughed about how easily he made friends.

Then she met Maya and they had an instant connection. She wasn't an artist herself but she loved art more than anyone Clarke had ever met before. So even though Maya was majoring in something completely different she was still taking art history and intro to art and just about any other class she could that didn't actually involve her being an artist herself. They joked about how they made the perfect pair because Clarke could actually do the art stuff and Maya could admire it.

Clarke was happy that she made a friend at school but she couldn't help but miss Raven. Over the weekends they attempted to hang out but with Raven having a new boyfriend, it made things harder.

Clarke painted and she painted a lot, it was odd because when she originally started drawing she wasn't too fond of drawing people but now it was her go to. At the beginning she still drew a lot of Murphy but it had gradually gone down, she made herself focus on other people.

Since both NYU and Columbia would be letting out in December, Clarke had mentioned having a party at their place and inviting their new friends so they could all get to know each other. Raven loved the idea, Murphy didn't seem to mind either way, he was just excited for the break from school and getting wasted, and Clarke could tell Wells was just excited about the whole experience, since he grew up a lot like Clarke the only parties that he really got to go to were stuffy ones with his dad.

School had been out for break for a couple days now and Clarke couldn't help but still have herself shut in her studio. She was working on a new painting that was actually for herself and her roommates. This would be the first finished piece that wasn't directly connected to an assignment at school that she would show her friends. She knew it was kind of cheesy but she had the idea a while ago and just had been gradually working on it between her other painting and now that it was almost finished she was a little proud of herself. She painted the four of them, all from her memory not using any kind of reference. On the left side was Murphy, who she had perfected since obviously she had drew him enough, then was Raven and herself with Wells on the right. They all had big smiles on their faces like they were having the time of their lives. The background of the paining was a mix of colors, nothing solid, which the color combination just made them look that much happier. This is how she wanted to remember them and this experience.

Clarke had just finished her painting and left it on the easel in her studio to dry. She walked out of the room and noticed Wells standing in the kitchen, the moment he saw her he started laughing.

"What's so funny?" She asked.

He walked up to her, "well you have paint, all over."

Clarke looked down at her arms and realized he was in fact right, she had spots of paint all over. She could only imagine what her face looked like. "I guess that's what happens when I get in the zone, but on a good note, it's finished."

"Do we finally get to see it?" Wells asked excitably.

She told them that she had been painting something for all of them that she hoped to hang in their house when she finally completed it. "Not yet, gotta wait for it to dry then I'll show you all at the same time."

"So no sneak peek?" He said all whiny.

Clarke couldn't help but laugh, "Nope."

She made her way to the stairs, stopping by the room that held all her artwork. In the center of the room was a portrait of her and her dad, she needed it to be the center point of the room. She stood there staring at the picture then whispered, "thank you daddy, for always taking care of me, even when you're not around anymore."

She felt herself get emotional and was completely taken aback when she felt an arm around her shoulders. She hadn't realized anyone else was home except her and Wells. She knew who the arm belonged to before she even turned and saw him taking in her paintings.

"He'd be so proud of you." Murphy said softly into the side of her head.

Clarke laid her head on his shoulder and he pulled her in closer. "I made that from one of my favorite pictures of the two of us."

"It's really good." He responded not taking his eyes from inside the room.

This was the first time any of her friends had seen the inside of the room since she started filling it with her paintings. She wasn't really sure why she didn't share them with everyone but in the back of her mind she guessed it was just because she didn't think they were as good as they actually were.

When Murphy started walking toward the room that's when Clarke snapped out of it, she grabbed ahold of his hand, pulling him back. "Nope I think you've seen enough."

She made her way around him and shut the door. Looking back at him she couldn't help but smile "damn you now Raven is going to be jealous, I'm going to have to show her to." She laughed "Oh and Wells, you know he would be irate if I left him out."

"Or we could just let this be our little secret and then you don't have to show anyone else and it would just be me who saw them." He smirked.

"You would like that huh? So what would that make you, like favorite friend huh?" Clarke had to admit that it was nice to be able to have a conversation with him like this again.

Murphy nodded in agreement "you know you've always secretly liked me better than them anyway."

She laughed, really laughed and then he pretended that she hurt his feelings by laughing the way she did.

"Hey you can't deny it, I have proof." Now she was confused.

"What proof do you have? That you snuck up on me when I was having an emotional moment with my dad?" She snickered.

"Nope." He quickly made his way by her and opened the door that she had shut minutes before and headed to the paintings that she had made of him.

"Murphy stop." Now she wasn't playing, there was only a few of the paintings showing that she did of him but if he moved the couple that were in the open he would see some that she didn't want anyone to see, especially not him.

When she said stop, Murphy hadn't thought it was a big deal that he hadn't listened but that was until he started going through the other painting behind the ones of him. He wasn't sure but he figured all the ones behind them was of him to he just hadn't realized how right he was. After seeing the first few he felt Clarke's hands on him trying to pull him back.

"There's a reason I didn't want you or anyone else seeing these, this is like your reading my diary Murphy, this is my private stuff." She said knowing that the main reason she didn't want to him to see them is because he wouldn't understand why she painted what she did.

When he turned around, it wasn't anger in his eyes it was something else, but Clarke couldn't put her finger on what it was exactly. "When did you do these?"

She took a shaky hand and pointed to the one in the very back "That was the first, it's why it's not that good, I was still learning, these are the newest but I haven't done anything like that in a while, I've been pushing myself away from drawing you in general, it's just weird."

"Weird huh?" He said with a quick glance to her than back to the paintings. "Well I would really appreciate it if these are never seen by anyone else's eyes but ours."

She laughed nervously "Well I never intended you to see them either, they were supposed to be for my eyes only."

"Why did you draw that?" She had expected him to ask that even though she had hoped he wouldn't.

She took a breath than started "I didn't want to forget it."

He interrupted her "what about Bellamy?"

Clarke didn't understand his question "What about him?"

"Did you, you know, paint you two?" He asked hesitantly.

Clarke closed her eyes, she didn't know what the right answer to that question was. She hadn't but she didn't know if that was the answer he was looking for or if he would feel better if she told him she did.

"Look it doesn't mean anything, just let it go." Clarke tried to change the subject.

He turned and looked at her again this time not taking his eyes from her "just answer me."

She sighed "No I didn't, and before you think more into it than you should, you should know that the only reason I did was because I was still so hung up on you but you know that, you know how I felt."

"You drew us having sex Clarke, I get that you're an artist but that's just weird to me, that's like me taking pictures or something and just keeping them around my room." He was obviously not taking this very well and Clarke understood completely.

"I'm sorry." She really didn't know what else to say. "I thought about getting rid of them a couple times but just couldn't, that was one of the best moments of my life after my dad died, it was the first time I felt something again, so I know that day might have meant nothing to you but it meant a lot to me."

This time when he looked at her, his expression softened. "It meant something to me to, I know it might not have meant the same that it did to you but it did mean something. All I ask is if you keep these I'd appreciate it if you had them somewhere that someone couldn't just stumble onto them."

Clarke wrapped her arms around his neck, he was hesitant but he followed and did the same to her waist. When the hug went on a fraction of a second longer than it should have she pulled back, she just got her friendship back with him and she wasn't going to ruin it again.


	13. Chapter 12

_Thank you sooo much for your reviews!_

 _I love you all :D_

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Chapter 12

It was the day of the party and they had just finished getting everything set up. Murphy had been in charge of the drinks and Clarke was pleasantly surprised that he came through big time, he didn't only get beer but actually got some stuff to make some of the girly drinks that Clarke liked so much. She had been afraid that their friendship would have taken a toll after he saw her paintings but it hadn't. They even joked about it on several occasions. She did end up showing Raven and Wells the room as well but minus a few revealing paintings that no one needed to see except for her and Murphy.

The painting that Clarke drew of the four of them now hung in the main room of the house over the couch. She felt so loved when they had suggested it go there so anyone who entered the house could see it.

Wick was the first of the guests to arrive but since he already knew everyone no introduction was needed. He is the one that Raven had been dating, the same guy that she met at the club and just happened to going to NYU for the same thing Raven is except he's a year further into the degree than she is.

The next time the doorbell rang Wells answered it and Clarke saw Monty enter the house with some dark haired boy who had a pair of goggles on his head, she chuckled at the sight. Just as Wells was about the shut the door two more boys walked up and Murphy was at the door telling them he was glad they could make it. Clarke noticed that the darker skinned boy kept looking at her, she was starting to wonder what Murphy told them about her.

When Maya finally made it Clarke lost track of anyone else who came. She was giving Maya and her friend Harper a tour of the house when they ran into Murphy's friend upstairs.

Clarke smiled at them and decided to introduce herself "Hi I'm Clarke, this is Maya and Harper."

Both boys smiled at them but Clarke noticed the same dark skinned boy from earlier was once again looking at her for a little too long. He finally extended his hand to her. "John."

John kept ahold of her hand a little longer than she would have liked, she had to admit he was gorgeous, with his dark skin and vibrant green eyes but the fact that he was there as Murphy's guest she just found it inappropriate. Once his interaction with Clarke was over he just gave the other two girls a head nod.

The other finally introduced himself as "Sterling." Nothing to memorable happened with him, he just seemed like he felt out of place.

They all made their way back downstairs where Clarke had realized a bit of other people had joined the party. Raven ran up to her with a girl that Clarke hadn't seen before.

"Hey I want you to meet Sasha, Sasha this is Clarke." Clarke smiled at girl and noticed the similarities between the two, if she didn't know Raven she would think they were sisters.

Clarke looked around and thought how crazy it was that just the four of them had made this many friends. But then when she thought about it she seemed to be the only awkward one of the group, so the surprise was really how she could be part of a part with this many people there. Growing up she didn't really get along with many people with the exception of Wells. But now that she finally felt like she found herself, she was able to expand the people around her.

Clarke had took Maya by the hand and was introducing her to all of her friends, two down, she only had one more to go but she lost track of Murphy. After checking everywhere downstairs she decided that maybe he made his way upstairs so she made her way back up there. She heard his voice once they reached the top of the stairs, he was talking to his friend John and about her.

"So man I have to know, how do you sleep right down the hall from her and not sneak into her room at night." John was asking Murphy.

"It's nothing like that, I look at her and only see a friend, I want to jump her bones just as much as I do yours." Murphy laughed and it actually hurt Clarke's feelings.

Clarke was still holding onto Maya's hand and tightened the hold on it.

"So then you wouldn't mind if I tried to get her number then?" Clarke held her breath waiting to see what Murphy's answer would be.

"If you can't get it yourself then I can help you out with that." Clarke couldn't believe that he was fine with it.

She knew they were only friends but she couldn't imagine dating someone that he's friends with or vice versa. She guessed she always hoped that somewhere deep down he still felt something for her. She was starting to get pissed and since she was buzzed she knew what she was about to do was a mistake but she smiled at Maya then finally ascended the steps the rest of the way.

"Hey there you are." She smiled sweetly at Murphy. "I wanted Maya to meet all you guys and you disappeared on me."

Murphy hesitated then smiled back and then looked at Maya and said "It's nice to meet you Maya."

They stood there for a few moments when Clarke walked over to John and asked "Do you like art? I was about to show off my paintings to Maya and thought I'd see if you wanted to join us."

She knew she shouldn't mess around with this boy because she was pissed at Murphy but she had already started and wasn't going to stop for a while. At least not while she was still a bit drunk. She still had ahold of Maya's hand so she grabbed John's with her other one dragging them both to her room.

"Now you two better feel special because I don't like to show my stuff, just ask Murphy he didn't even see it until about a week ago and that was only because he snuck up on me, he's like that sneaky." She said with a little hiss.

When she was unlocking the door she felt John place his hand on her lower back and as much as she wanted to tell him to not touch her, she didn't. She knew Murphy was still watching and she wanted him to see exactly what he caused. She only showed them a few paintings but promised Maya she would show her the rest another day, as they walked back out of the room her eyes went to Murphy's room immediately and she noticed he was gone.

Maya told them that she had to go check on Harper and that she would meet up with her a little later on. Clarke wanted to beg her not to leave her alone but she just swallowed her pride and let her walk away.

"If you'd be more comfortable we can go back downstairs, I know you don't know me and this may be a little awkward." John said surprising Clarke.

She smiled at him "I think I'm alright, thanks though."

"Can I tell you something?" He said seeming embarrassed.

"Sure." She responded.

"I asked Murphy about you, I don't know what it was but when I saw you earlier I couldn't take my eyes off you." He swallowed "I've been around my fair share of pretty girls but nothing compared to you."

Clarke felt the heat rising to her cheeks, she hated to admit it but it felt nice getting a compliment from someone.

"If we're being honest here, I saw you watching me but I really didn't know what to think." She couldn't believe she shared that with him.

He fidgeted then after taking a deep breath he said really fast "I actually thought you and Murphy had something going on."

"Why would you think that?" She was curious.

"I saw the way you looked at him, it's why I talked to him first, I didn't want to step on anyone's toes." He admitted.

"And since he gave you the all clear you decided to go ahead and test your luck."

He let out a light laugh "yea so how am I doing?"

Clarke realized right then that it wouldn't be right to lead him on, he seemed like he might actually be a decent guy. "Honestly you'd be doing pretty well if it was anyone but me."

John looked at her confused, "What does that mean?"

"It means my heart belongs to someone already, even though he has no interest in me that way I can't seem to get over him." She said with a sigh.

"It is Murphy isn't it?" He asked getting the hint.

She nodded "It has been for a while."

"Well maybe I can change that." He paused "Well that's if you would give me the opportunity."

Clarke looked at him and she honestly didn't know what to say. On one hand she knew she needed to get over Murphy because nothing would ever happen with him again but then on the other hand she didn't know if she was ready to give him up yet.

"I'll tell you what, I'll give you my number and let's see where that takes us." She figured she'd at least try. "Just make sure you let Murphy know that you succeeded on your own though that you don't need his help."

"You heard that huh?" He asked.

Clarke tried not to look disappointed "yea, it's not really something I wanted to hear but maybe it's exactly what I needed to."

After they were finished talking they made their way back down to the rest of the party, Clarke couldn't help but look around for Murphy but he was nowhere to be found. She figured it was probably better that he wasn't around because she was pretty pissed and she didn't want to say something that she may regret later.

The rest of the night she didn't focus on Murphy or his friend that he pretty much sent to ask her out, she focused on her friends. She couldn't help but notice that certain couples were starting to form, she didn't know if any of them would stick but she'd be happy to at least help one couple. Maya obviously had a thing for goggle boy, Jasper she thought she remember his name being. Her friend Harper had eyes for Monty but so far hadn't even talk to him. Wells and Sasha were all over each other which was a weird site for Clarke to see. Then you had Raven and Wick who hadn't taken their hands off each other. Clarke wouldn't deny that she was jealous, she just wished that the person she wanted felt the same.

* * *

 _And I just wanted to point out that I got the Sasha character from the books, she is the grounder that Wells is with.. I liked them from the books sooo figured I'd add her here lol_


	14. Chapter 13

_Thank you for your review Heidi. Also thank you to each and everyone else who has followed this, I hope everyone is enjoying! It is actually coming to an end, I'm thinking I have one more chapter than the epilogue._

 _So... My first almost complete Clurphy fic. I'm working on a few others atm as well, another Clurphy and a Bellarke. Not sure when I will post either though, been a little distracted lately being a kid again, playing some Pokemon Go lol.  
_

* * *

Chapter 13

With all their guests finally gone, Clarke was left with cleanup pretty much by herself. Raven left with Wick and Wells took Sasha back to his room. Clarke still hadn't seen Murphy since she was with John earlier in the night. She started cleaning up herself but then decided the hell with it, she was going to go see where Murphy disappeared to. She climbed the steps and stood outside Murphy's room it took her about a good five minutes before she got up the nerve to knock, but there was no answer. She huffed then pushed the door open noticing right away that he was sound asleep in his bed.

Clarke knew she should have just left his room, she shouldn't have walked further into it closing the door behind her. She walked around to the side of the bed that was empty, slipped her shoes and jeans off and climbed in. She had no idea what was going through her head right then, she was beyond a little tipsy and in her mind she just wanted someone to cuddle with. Since he was laying on his back she laid her head lightly on his chest, stretching her arm and leg over his torso.

She fell asleep mere minutes after climbing into the bed. She was actually sleeping pretty peacefully until she was woke up by something heavy landing on her. It took Clarke a few minutes to remember where she was, sometime during the night she had turned and was facing the wall opposite of Murphy and it was his arm that woke her. He was snuggled up against her back and now his arm laid across her, she slowly turned her head and saw that he was still very much out of it. She sighed then scooted back the few inches that had separated them and was surprised when his body reacted to hers. She could feel everything through the thin fabric of her underwear.

She took a few deep breaths than attempted to move away from him but that didn't work the way she hoped, he held onto her with the arm that he had wrapped around her. She cursed under her breath, he was going to kill her for putting them in this situation. After attempting a few times with no success she decided the hell with it and put her hand over Murphy's and just laid back down. But because of the current situation going on below the covers she was having a hard time falling back to sleep.

She must have eventually fallen back asleep because the next time she was woke up was by a very angry Murphy. "What the hell?"

He was sitting up, staring down at her. "Good morning to you to."

"Why are you in my bed?" He asked getting straight to it.

"Uh... Well I actually came to bitch about you taking off halfway through the party but when I saw you sleeping, I decided to join you." Clarke really didn't know what to tell him, honestly when she laid down it was just to sleep.

"You do know that you have a room of your own just right down the hall?" He said sarcastically.

"In all reality, they are all my rooms and if I decide I want to sleep in a different one each night, then I could do that." She smiled at her smartass remark.

"I think it's kind of rude, if you're not wanted." Now it was Murphy's turn to smirk.

Clarke smacked his arm and since it was still bare it ended up being a lot harder than she had originally intended.

"I don't care what you say I know I'm wanted." She paused "It may not be by you but I am wanted by someone."

"Oh I know just how much you're wanted." He said almost sounding jealous.

Clarke raised her eyebrows "to bad it's not from the person I want to be wanted by."

Murphy just stared at her but didn't respond.

"How can you be alright for him going after me?" She finally said even though she knew she shouldn't have.

He looked puzzled "what do you mean?"

"You pretty much sent John to ask me out, do I really mean that little to you that you'd be ok if I dated one of your friends." She took a deep breath and waited for the answer that she knew she wouldn't want to hear.

"I didn't think you'd agree to it." His response was not what she expected.

"Then why didn't you tell him to back the hell off? You could have made up some excuse and said friends were off limits but no you told him to go after me and even told him that you'd give him my number if he failed to do it himself." She was getting pissed just thinking about it.

When he didn't respond she looked at him in disbelief and turned and got off the bed. Usually she would care that she didn't currently have pants on but she was so mad she didn't ever grab them, she just walked past Murphy toward the door.

"Clarke stop." He pleaded with her.

But she didn't stop, by the time she reached the door she felt his hands on her arm. She tried to shake it off but he wasn't having any part of it, so when he pulled her around to face her she didn't expect what happened next. One second she was looking at the door the next she was turned around with Murphy's lips on hers. Clarke didn't know what to think, this is what she had wanted for so long but now she was so shocked she couldn't respond.

When he pulled back it was obvious his feelings were hurt from her not kissing him back. "I shouldn't have done that."

He walked back to the bed and Clarke just watched him then finally feeling she could speak she said "No you shouldn't have, not unless it meant something."

"I don't know what it means." He said putting his head in his hands.

"You need to figure it out, I can't have you going around doing something like that if it doesn't mean something to you." She hesitated before she said "Murphy you need to understand, I seriously care for you and I have for some time now, it's not just some crush, its real and honestly it scares the shit out of me because I have this feeling that I will be hurt in the end."

"It does mean something, I just don't know what exactly, I've known I care about you for a while now but I'm not sure if it's enough that I want to risk our friendship." He finally looked back up and it was obvious that this was something he had been struggling with.

"Well I'll tell you something, doing stupid stuff like that won't help our friendship." She walked closer to him "If there was no feelings involved it wouldn't be that big of a deal but since there is it confuses things."

"I know this may seem like a stupid question but how did you know that you really cared for me, more than a friend that is?" He really seemed out of his element.

"Raven was the first to bring it up actually, I knew I was attracted to you but I thought that's all it was, just an attraction." She sat down next to him on the bed "But once she got the idea in my head it wouldn't go away, the more I watched you the more I knew I wanted more than just a friendship."

"What if it doesn't work?" He swallowed "it could ruin our friendship."

"I'm not going to sit here and act like there isn't that possibility because there always is, it all depends on what happens to make it end." She wanted to be completely honest with him.

"Would it be worth it?" He wanted her to answer for him.

"I can't answer that for you, that's something you'll have to figure out on your own." Clarke sighed.

Clarke left him with that to think things through. She knew to her it would be worth it but that didn't mean that it would be to Murphy.


	15. Chapter 14

_Thank you once again Heidi for your review, you always make my day! I'm sad to see this end but when it feels like its the right time, it just does. I'm going to post this chapter and the epilogue since I have it all finished out._

 _Also I'm working on two different Bellarke's right now, I think I will post one here soon. The other not so sure lol. I'm kind of not sure where the second one is going._

 _Also started another Clurphy but not really sure when or if I'll post that one... lol... I tend to start a lot but not end up posting majority of them. Right now I have 9 different ones started lmao. Certain ones just seem to come easier as I write so I post them._

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Chapter 14

It had been a little over two weeks since Murphy kissed Clarke and still they never really talked about it. Clarke figured that was because he had made his choice and he realized that it wouldn't be worth the risk of losing their friendship. She was alright with that choice, she would have preferred another but it wasn't up to her.

She and John had actually stayed in contact after meeting him at the party. He attempted to ask her out on a few occasions but she let him know she wasn't ready for any kind of relationship. And he seemed to actually understand. Most of their conversations were nothing but friendly, he didn't even try to insinuate anything, which she appreciated.

With Christmas now over Clarke was back to her painting. She's had a lot of inspiration lately, she had pretty much locked herself in her studio and painted and painted. She heard her phone ding a few different times but didn't go to it until she finished the piece she was currently working on. She finally made her way to her phone and saw the texts were from John.

 **12:48 PM**

Hey what are you doing?

 **12:50 PM**

Clarke?

 **1:00 PM**

When you get this text me back, got something for you.

 **1:23 PM**

You better not bought me anything

 **1:24 PM**

Well hello to you to

 **1:24 PM**

And what are you going to do if I did buy you something?

 **1:25 PM**

We agreed that we wasn't going to do that

 **1:25 PM**

Actually if I recall it right, you agreed to it, not me

 **1:26 PM**

JOHN, you better not have!

 **1:26 PM**

I won't accept it

 **1:27 PM**

You may want to see what it is before you say that

 **1:27 PM**

And I can't return it so if you don't accept it then I'll be out the money and I can't use it

 **1:30 PM**

Fine but I want you to know I'm mad at you

 **1:32 PM**

Ha! I knew you'd cave

 **1:33 PM**

You at home? I'm right around the corner

 **1:35 PM**

Yep just let me know when you're here, I'm painting

 **1:39 PM**

I'm here

Clarke didn't even attempt to clean herself up, she knew she probably looked a mess but when she was in the zone it's usually how she got. When she opened the door John was just walking up, she noticed right away that he was carrying something pretty big.

"What is that?" She asked as soon as he walked inside.

"Oh this little thing, just something I thought you might like." He smirked.

"You better not have went all crazy." She told him and she meant it.

He laughed "Oh I didn't."

Clarke just stood staring at him, she wasn't really sure what to think. Yea they had been talking pretty much every day the last two weeks and have even seen each other on a few occasions. But she hoped she made it perfectly clear that she didn't want a relationship with him.

He actually looked kind of nervous when he handed her the present. She took her time to open it and when she saw what it was, she was overjoyed. She threw her arms around him.

"I can't believe you got that." She said pretty much in his ear since she was hugging him.

He had gotten her a huge art kit, it had watercolors, oil paints and acrylic paints. Every color she could possibly imagine. Of course she had tons of paint but it was the thought that counted. And she knew something like this must have cost a lot.

When John attempted to kiss her once she backed from the hug, she stopped him.

Clarke sighed "If that is the only reason you got me this, you can take it back."

"I'm sorry." He said and he actually looked sorry. "I don't know why I did that."

"I like you John but not like that, you're a nice guy but me and you we will only ever be friends." She actually felt bad, she felt like maybe she lead him on in some way.

"I know… I know…" He took a deep breath "Actually I know exactly why I did it, I thought maybe if I could get your mind away from Murphy than I might just have a chance."

Now she really felt bad "I appreciate that because it's hard but I don't want to get over him."

He looked at her confused "what do you mean?"

"I love him." She stopped, she wasn't sure why she said that did she really love him?

"You do?" John asked looking just as shocked as she felt.

"I think I do, I think it's why I can't get over him, why in my heart I always knew I never really wanted to." This admission was just as new to Clarke as it was John.

"So I have no chance here do I?" He asked with a chuckle.

She shook her head "I don't think anyone has in a long time."

John actually stuck around for about a half hour and things seemed to be alright between them. She was kind of pissed at first but now she had a suspicion that John was put up to it. She wasn't sure by who exactly yet but she was planning on finding out. She had just walked him out and turned around to find Murphy staring at her. She stopped.

"Hey I didn't know you were home." She said trying to not let her voice break.

"Did you mean it?" He was staring at her intently now.

"What are you talking about?" She asked him thinking she may know what he was talking about but didn't want to assume.

Murphy took a breath "I was listening… I heard what you told John. About me."

Clarke could feel her heart pounding in her chest. She didn't know what to say. "I… Uh…"

Murphy walked closer to her. "Clarke I need to know."

She wasn't sure why but her eyes began to water. She had no reason to cry.

Finally she slowly nodded. Not wanting to say the words out loud to him.

When he pulled her into a hug she didn't know what to think, she just started bawling. She felt like a baby.

"Why are you crying?" He tilted her up so he could see her face.

"I don't know." She sniffled.

He took his hand and wiped the tears from both cheeks and then just stood there looking into her eyes.

"I think… I think I…" Murphy was trying to say something but was obviously having problems getting it out. He took a deep breath then finally said "I think I might uh love you to."

Clarke's stance completely changed, she looked at him and kept thinking to herself that she must have heard him wrong. There was no way that he could feel the same. She knew she should have probably said something but she didn't.

She felt things start to feel awkward but the moment Murphy leaned down and placed his lips over hers ever doubt that had went through her mind was gone. She knew he meant it and she now knew that she had as well. The love that she felt between them was undeniable.

When he pulled back she felt it was far too soon but that was before she heard him whisper "I love you Clarke Griffin."

"I love you to John Murphy." She could feel herself shaking. She had never told anyone other than her parents that she loved them.

This time it was her turn to kiss him, it was a lot more heated this time. She could feel the want and need from both of them.

They heard someone clear their throat. They broke apart both panting, when Clarke saw Raven standing in the doorway she felt her cheeks slowly starting to burn.

"Well, well, well… Even after talking to John I never expected to walk in on this." Raven said with a huge grin on her face.

That's when it hit her, Raven was the one who sent John in to find out exactly how she felt about Murphy.

"You knew, didn't you?" Clarke asked her best friend.

"I suspected it, you for a while now" She said to Clarke then turned to face Murphy "you more recently."

Clarke couldn't help but feel giddy, after all this time it ended up being Raven that helped them see how they really felt about each other. Clarke had no idea what the future held for them but she was willing to take the ride. She hoped she was right and it was worth the risk. All she could do is wait and see.


	16. Epilogue

Epilogue

Clarke couldn't believe that they were now college graduates. It seemed like just yesterday that they were just starting college. She had ended up getting a degree in art as well as business management. She figured since she still had a lot of the money her dad left her, what better way to manage it then to purchase her own place to display her artwork. She had not only displayed her own stuff but she had other local artists that she met through school that she helped out. She had become successful and she couldn't help but think it was all because of her dads help. She knew if it wouldn't have been for him she would still be in medicine and still going through school right now.

Wells had moved out about two years ago, he and Sasha had actually got a place together after she ended up getting pregnant. Clarke told him she'd be happy to just have her move in with them since they had plenty of space but he would have none of it. He wanted to take care of Sasha and their child on his own and she completely understood that. Clarke really believed their little girl was the cutest kid she had ever seen, she was lighter skinned than Wells and had her mother's green eyes. Absolutely gorgeous.

Wick actually moved in with them, well Raven after about a year. He had still been living in the dorms and since he and Raven had been getting really close Clarke mentioned it to her and within a week he was moved in. Clarke was happy that her best friend had found love and she wanted to help in any way possible to make things easier for her.

Clarke and Murphy had a slow start at their relationship. They wanted to make sure that they did everything the right way. Neither of them wanted to mess up this chance. It only took a few weeks for them to know for sure that what they had was something real. Now here it was almost 4 years later and they were going just as strong as they were in the beginning. They hadn't really talked much about their future, all they really knew was they wanted to be together and since Clarke had her studio in New York they decided they were going to stay there.

It was a couple weeks since graduation. Raven had asked Clarke out for lunch. They had just sat down to eat and Clarke could tell something was bothering her best friend.

"Hey what's going on?" She asked concerned.

Raven took a deep breath "I think we're going to start looking for a place of our own soon."

Clarke hadn't expected that. "Why?"

"You really have to ask that?" She sighed "Clarke you know if I could I would live with you forever but were growing up and I'm guessing before long were going to want to start a family and well I'd like to be on my own feet before doing that."

"You're wanting kids?" Clarke couldn't hide her excitement.

Raven chuckled "I think I might, not right now but one day."

"I feel like I might be happier than you are." Clarke gushed "That means that our kids could grow up being best friends to. Oh god when did I turn in to one of those girls."

Clarke couldn't help but laugh. Love had really changed her, it made her such a happier person. A person that could actually see the wedding, see the kids, and see the growing old with the person they love.

"So what about you, when are you gonna start having kids?" She asked skeptically.

Clarke gave a slight laugh "Uh actually in about 8 months."

Raven just stared at her but it took her a minute to actually say anything then all she got out was "what?"

"I'm pregnant." Clarke pretty much shouted to the entire restaurant.

"Does Murphy know?" Raven was still shocked.

"Not yet, I was planning on telling him tonight." She beamed.

Finally Raven smiled a real genuine smile, "this is great."

They talked pretty much the rest of lunch and then when Raven got a text she started acting a little odd. She was a little fidgety, not making eye contact.

"Were going to have to get going." Raven finally said after a few minutes of a very awkward silence.

They didn't talk much on the way back to the house and when they pulled up Raven said "I'm going to have to just drop you off, I gotta do something."

"Uh ok" Clarke said giving her an odd look.

Clarke got out of the car and walked to the front door, she tried to open it but it was locked. She figured Murphy must have went out somewhere so she pulled her keys out and unlocked the door. As soon as the door opened, she felt her heart start to beat wildly.

There was a path made starting at the doorway in rose petals. She looked around and noticed candles lit everywhere. She felt like her feet were stuck to the floor, she wanted to follow the rose petals but she couldn't get her feel to cooperate with her. Finally after a good minute, even though it felt longer she was able to move. She followed the petals and noticed where they lead before she even made it there. She slowly pushed open the door to her studio and when she saw Murphy standing there, her eyes watered immediately. He was wearing a suit, John Murphy was wearing a suit, this was a site that Clarke never thought she would witness.

Clarke looked around her studio and noticed there was pictures of them two of them, everywhere. She hadn't even realized they had taken so many pictures together. Then in the center of the room next to Murphy was something she was guessing he painted, it sat on her easel. It was just pretty much a mess of colors but to her it was beautiful.

"You know the day I met you I couldn't take my eyes off you, I saw you sitting at the bar by yourself and I told myself that day that I had to get to know you. I never figured I'd actually be lucky enough to have a chance with someone like you." Murphy moved closer to her.

"I messed up time and time again and somehow you still wanted me. I don't know what it was but I'm glad you never gave up on me. Honestly I was afraid of you." He gave a slight laugh "I know how that sounds but you terrified me, you came from a different world than me and I kept thinking that one day you would wake up and realize that you belonged with someone who was more like you."

"I couldn't imagine living even a single day without you in my life." He got down on one knee and pulled a box from his pocket "Clarke would you make me the happiest man on this earth and marry me?"

Clarke's hands were trembling, her whole body was shaking, she attempted to answer him but when no words would form she just nodded. Of course she would marry him. He took her left hand and slid the ring on, it fit perfectly.

As soon as he stood she was in his arms. "I love you."

"And I love you."

Once the initial shock had worn off she was finally able to really look around the room. She noticed there was some pictures that were from back in Virginia before they even moved to New York.

"How'd you get these?" She asked curiously.

"I had a lot of help, I couldn't have pulled this off without Raven." He admitted.

He walked up behind her and snaked his arms around her waist, his hands over her stomach. She placed hers on top of his. "Uh well I have a surprise for you as well."

"What's that?" She felt his breathe against her cheek.

She slowly turned around keeping her hands in his. She looked him in his eyes then took his hands and placed them on her stomach.

He seemed to get it immediately. "You're pregnant?"

She smiled then nodded.

He pulled her into a hug again. "Were going to be parents." He was thrilled.

If anyone would have told Clarke that her life would have ended up like this, she would have never believed it. To end up with someone she truly loved and loved her just the same was never something she thought she would have. She believed every day that her dad was still looking over her and watching out for her. She couldn't help but think he was more than a little responsible for the happiness that she now has.

Clarke knew that she would never take for granted anything in her life. That included Murphy, their child, her house, her career, everything. She knew how easily things could be taken away from you and she would never want to lose the important things in her life, not today, not ever.

* * *

 _I hope you all like the conclusion to my story :)_


End file.
